Today, I found out that my boyfriend is afraid of female orgasms. Right as I was about to climax, he panicked, pulled out, and ran into the bathroom. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, I had my first orgasm. He thought something was wrong, so he stopped. FML
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. I started to moan right when I was about to climax. He got worried, stopped and asked, "Are you okay?!" FML
Today, I finally talked my boyfriend into going down on me. Everything went well until I came and instinctively gripped his head with my thighs. He panicked and we both rolled off of the bed crocodile-style. Now he's too scared to even have sex with me. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. I was making a list of things to do tomorrow while faking an orgasm when I realize my boyfriend had finished about two minutes ago. He's pissed. FML
Today, after having sex with my boyfriend for the first time, he told me he wanted to break up. He told me my orgasm face wasn't something he could put up with. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting intimate. As I started getting close to having my first ever orgasm, I got extremely short of breath and started hyperventilating. His reaction was to cover my mouth to shut me up. FML
Today, I had a panic attack because my boyfriend thought it would be sexy to choke me in the middle of sex. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML
Today, as I was about to orgasm while my boyfriend was giving me oral sex, I tightened my grip on his hair and began shouting his name. He stopped, looked up at me, and said, "What?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have intercourse for the first time. One minute into it, he got nervous and farted. What's worse is that his fart scared him, and he asked "What was that?" FML
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Top comments
kiran_fml 5
Wtf is he afraid of?? You're going to blow up on him or something?
josebaseball11 14
Get on top next time. It will make it harder for him run.
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Comments (128)
obeliks 4
Find someone older than thirteen, then maybe
micahsmommy 13
Well if you're the girlfriend who sounded like a zombie while having sex you can't really blame him. Quit yelling "brains!" and he might stick around.
lotrgeek 10
For the record, it was me sounding like a zombie.. It was my boyfriend behaving like a zombie whilst going down on me. If you're going to quote a previous FML, at least get it right! FAIL!
micahsmommy 13
Lotrgeek- You're the one who had the sister interrupt to borrow the zombie movie? Pretty sure the FML said you were interrupted during sex and you sounded like a zombie. Doc bastard had the lovely comment about you screaming "brains". Just figured I'd play off the two of them.
lotrgeek 10
Ok... The Epic Fail would be mine. Sorry!
charlotte69er 7
Hes not worth it
The_Hitdude 12
Every single comment of yours that I've read has either very little or no thought put into it. Do you know the circumstances that lead up to his phobia? Do you know whether or not this can be resolved? Or are you just the kind of bitch who would dump a guy without even attempting to understand/resolve an issue? I can gurantee you're single. But then, I don't know why I'm wasting my time on you; You're probably not worth it. OP-Don't listen to this shallow advice. This could be a serious issue, go to a psychologist for therapy to get to, and eventually resolve the underlying issue. Good luck.
bfsd42 20
74, you are calling a 15 year old girl a bitch just cos u don't like her comments. That's just downright lame. Typical of a Brit.
ghostlilac 25
76, you are negatively stereotyping 74 just because you don't like his/her comment. That's just downright lame. Typical of a racist.
titzenpitzer 9
hahahahaha that's funny
betterNowThanLat 5
maybe she squirts D:
grannygruber 6
Next time supress the moaning and such until you actually have the ****** so he doesn't get the chance to pull and run!
shahroni1 3
you are in love with GAY.
YdoIhaveAchode 4
That makes no sense. ^
curthayman 1
Lmao!!!!
CinnamonRugby 5
Op: Dont worry, there more afraid of you than you are of it. Boyfriend: NO! I've never seen one, but i've heard horrible stories about them!
j_cat187 20
Did he see "Teeth"? That might explain a few things.