Today, I found out that I'm not actually pregnant. I've apparently been having a hysterical pregnancy because I want a child so badly. I don't know which was worse, the look of relief on my husband's face or having to send a mass email to inform my family and friends. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, I found out my husband has been telling everyone he doesn't want a baby. He has been telling me he does. We have been trying for months. I'm now pregnant and confused. FML
Today, I found out my husband is having a baby. Too bad I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, my doctor told me I'm pregnant. Since we've been trying for several years, I called my husband to tell him the good news. Not long after, my doctor called to inform me there'd been a clerical mix-up and I'm not actually pregnant after all. FML
Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML
Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, after nearly a month, I found out my wife isn't pregnant after all. She was just screwing around to win a bet with her friends on how long it'd take me to figure out the truth. FML
Today, I had the abortion my husband and I agreed on, after multiple forms of birth control failed. His family somehow found out, and now they're all mad at us for not telling them I was ever pregnant, with a child we never wanted, and took precautions to avoid creating. FML
Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of me freaking out and him explaining how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was the best thus far. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office after getting a positive pregnancy test. She did another one to confirm the result, which came back negative. My husband is wandering around with a great big smile on his face, because he isn't going to "have a rugrat." FML
Today, after months of trying for a baby and telling me how he wants a family and can't wait to have a kid with me, my boyfriend was relieved when I got a negative home test, saying he's not ready for kids yet. I took another test this morning. I'm pregnant. FML
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Top comments
GoddessDigi 12
Aww, that really sucks... I remember having to tell everyone there wasn't a baby (but in my case it was a miscarriage). Have you guys tried a fertility clinic? Also, hysterical pregnancy doesn't mean she's a nutjob. She really wants a baby (and some women who don't experience it, as well) so it's not really weird for her to experience this, if she was hoping for it.
TrekkieGirl 0
@ #1, I agree. OP, why the heck would you have already told family and friends that you're expecting if you clearly hadn't gotten a test done? Most people wait a few months before saying anything. Also, if you're husband is relieved that you are not pregnant, that should tell you he's not ready to have kids. Which you shouldn't ignore! There is more to life than having kids. Find a hobby, because your fixation with having a baby is just unhealthy.
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Comments (224)
fogrunner 13
So adopt a kid or have a nice childFREE life. :D
deafgirlwalking 0
Then be childfree! Your husband obviously doesn't want kids, and you seem like a psycho. CHILFREE LIFE!
creamm 0
so exactly what happens on glee then.
hobsonbrendan 0
so...you're basically telling the world that you're totally crazy
Sekococo 0
OP ignorne the people who can't read before they commment and have no basic intelligence to look up a medical term before judging like a asshole who does not desreve to have a computer.
Ceridwen_fml 0
Don't worry, Nadya, there will be more. ...Okay, okay, that was mean of me. Sorry. I just resent people who think popping out kids is the most important thing in life when the world is already suffering from overpopulation. WTF is "wrong" with adoption??
myfriend_youfail 3
Most women will try to have a child of their own, and adoption is an absolute last resort. They'll try and try and try, and only adopt when infertility is an absolute certain fact. So the OP may not want to give up on having her own child just yet, before agreeing to raise someone else's child. And there's really nothing wrong with that, you know.
xNephilim 19
I absolutely love the thought of adopting and if it wasn't for the fact that it's so über expensive, I would probably end up adopting a child. Even so, the thought of conceiving, carrying, and bringing a child that is half me, half my fiancé into this world is the most amazing thought ever. It's natural to be wanting your OWN child.
kismet_fml 0
My heart hurts for you. I recently had a miscarriage and my husbands responce was "well, we need to get you on birth control because if we're not pregnant I dont wanna be."
girlybuddy 0
Im sorry honey. that is so sad.
oNikkio 0
This is anything but funny. To those who find this comical or think YDI get a life.
4toestatue 7
lol that's why u always double check with a pregnacy test... what's going on with you people? Mom I am finally pregnant.Y I am sure...