Today, I went to a dress up party. The theme was pirates and prostitutes. At the door I was handed a voucher that said: 'Thank you for dressing up. Collect your free drink at the bar.' I didn't dress up. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Nice disguise
Today, I had to walk through an extremely crowded pub wearing a dorky prisoner outfit to get to a dress-up party at the back. When we got there, I soon realised it wasn't fancy dress, but just black-and-white themed. FML
Halloween is cancelled
Today, I went to a Halloween party dressed as a pirate. Someone complimented me on how convincing the fake teeth were that I had on for my costume. I wasn't wearing fake teeth. FML
Today, my sister asked me if she could go into my closet to borrow my favourite dress for a party she was going to tonight. When I asked her where she was going, she said to a Halloween costume party. My sister is going as a prostitute. FML
Fruity party
Today, I went to a costume party dressed as a pineapple. As it turned out, the theme was "tropical", not "tropical fruit". Everyone else was in Hawaiian shirts while I stood there looking fruity. FML
The guest formerly known as…
Today, I went to a costume party dressed as Prince. As I walked into the party, I realized that I was the only one who hadn't received the memo that the costume part of the party had been cancelled. I spent the evening awkwardly mingling with a group of confused strangers while dressed in purple satin. FML
Today, I got all dressed up for a New Year's party. When my parents and siblings left the house to their parties, I got undressed. I wasn't going to a party. I only got dressed up so my family would think I had plans. FML
Today, I dressed up like a pirate, dressed my dog as a parrot and bought $30 worth of candy to pass out to trick-or-treaters. I waited by the door for 3 hours. Not one kid came. FML
Costume parties are the worst
Today, I went to a party dressed as a Pinata. Drunk people tried to hit me all night. FML
Geezer
Today, I went out to eat with some friends. I ordered a cocktail with my meal. I got carded, but had left my ID at home. Instead, I took my hat off to show that I'm bald. It worked. FML
Got em
Today, I got a call from my friend who invited me to a theme party. It was a goth theme, and I decided to get real into it. I put on a trench coat, black skin tight pants, and black paint under the eyes. When I got there I was greeted by a kid in a pink popped collar. It wasn't a theme party. FML
Top comments
pjfromok 0
Why would you go to a "dress up" party and not dress up??? They are going to assume you are dressed up. Fail.
jillian_xx 0
pretty sure they gave that same thing to everyone. big ******* deal. not a FML or a YDI.
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Comments (228)
mmmazingmary 0
second :) that's sucks :( but hey. work it if ur hot :)
apfunction 0
speak for yourself, your definately hot enough to work it ;)
lickmyjock 0
I'm drooling
demonic562 0
dayuuuum number 2 i'd tap that
Prestigex 0
*boi-oi-oi-oing*
050294 0
Fat girl angle shot done quite well, actually.
050294 0
The comment posted before I could finish :( Anyways... No, a **** is a ****, and them showing it is disgusting. I'm pretty sure your picture is a great FGAS - Fat Girl Angle Shot - a picture at an angle, usually a slutty, promiscuous one, hiding what their body truly looks like IRL. Get your attention wanting butt off the Internet, please.
pieceoschmidt 8
you are pretty damn gorgeous miss mary btw OP, you got a drink out of it, and a lot of people nowadays dress like pirates or ******, dont take it offensively
myfriend_youfail 3
O_o Seriously, Mary? Cover your ****. "A durrr I has bewbies, I want everyones on FML to looks at my BEWBIES!" Yikes.
responses 0
wow look at all these loser guys trying to flirt on fml hahahaha ever heard of **** you creepers?
fatfatgoeshome 8
I bet they didn't even notice she's underage.
whitley1031 0
haha, well although u are hot, mary, OP, fyl, bc u didnt purposely dress likea *****, tht guy just prolly wanted some of u and let u in. and btw, stop bashing mary bc altho she looks hot, idrt this is a phake photo. but mary, unless u WANT to look like OP, pick a diff pic. an if u do WANT to look likea *****, FML isnt the place to do it.
idkweird 0
The severe lack of "game" is cracking me up. Some of these guys are the same ones running around talking about how much they get laid. I honestly doubt it with lines like these. lmfao....wow!
idkweird 0
Oh, also...if she WAS a sif, her arm wouldn't be that thin. Sifs are pretty easy to pick out.
mfmylifesrsly 30
Mary you are hott and I'd tap you too. but, you should cover up some, I mean, do you want creepy old pervs jacking off to your ****? maybe you do, idk, but I do know your looking for attention right now. but I sometimes have those cravings too. anyway, if your ever in Houston let me know ;)
x_HELLo_tHERE_x 0
@97: I honestly think you 2 could make a cute couple.
omnistryder 0
I think #97 is Hott too
_TheSmallThings_ 0
Mary is hot. Nuff said.
_TheSmallThings_ 0
Number 97, ya id tap that to
Futurefrog 0
well that is what you get for going out looking like a pirate. plus y do u care if they thought you were a pirate? pirates r awesome
mfmylifesrsly 30
@100 I think we would make an awesome bi/lez couple as well! hopefully she'd let us threesome with a guy, cause I like penis too much >_<
Freeze_fml 17
Check out that chunky leg.
Mehness 0
Congratulations, you losers. You're trying to chat up a stranger online, thinking you'll get some mmorpg roleplay sex.
DonkeyDelight 0
I like your cleavage.
conversationist 0
win at #123
HoesInaBox 0
I smell jail bait
CharonTheShadow 0
#2... Not everyone who's hot should act like a *****... e.e
thecoolest 0
nice **** 2.
kayladance101 13
@132 .... what??
csf1998 0
its over at 123
ModernWarfare3_fml 0
Roflmfao #75 you're ******* awesome.
juli1124 0
sif???
Lancerman7449 0
and your pretty damn ugly #52
deathcab7 0
wow really? pretty sure you need to put the gals away hun and all these other guyss need to stop creeping. fyl #2 for trying to look hot, and failing. :/ uhhhm have a nice day! (:
fatalkiss 0
lol she's seventeen. go take cold showers
shadaboo2014 0
#2theyd mistake u2 but not cuz ur hot...cuz ur a cyberslut!
Hanban 0
Looking at #2's visitors (not including me), I can see that she wants anonymous people to go check her FGAS (or whatever the hell that you call it) just to be accepted. Anyway, I agree with a lot of people saying she's a ***** for showing her breasts. Win for 161 and 166. :D/
fatfatgoeshome 8
Since she's from the US and the legal age of consent in the US is 18, she is not legal. If you happen to be in Queensland, she's not legal there either.
Freeze_fml 17
The age of consent is lower in Texas.
alyxbabayy 0
haha agreed. its def a fgas. =]] and she is not hott at all.. she has no bottom lip haha
alyxbabayy 0
lol im just going to agree with this statement one more time
kukitheaf 0
NICE2 AND 97 LULZ fapfapfap
husky88 1
17 in NY. laws are strange. should be illegal to hit on a girl through fml...
greekgal44 14
really guys? stfu and leave her alone. maybe she just wanted to feel pretty. all of us girls do. its not like shes naked
Turner_22 0
Wait, OP, did you look more like a prostitute or a pirate?
WHODATNATION 0
so do you naturally look like prostitute?
Turner_22 0
So did you look more like a pirate or a prostitute? O_o
isminei 6
I like your hat. :)
foodlord 5
U GET A FREE DRINK! Enjoy it baby
Toasty283 8
You should've just played it off and went like, "check out y costume bitches!"
gr3y_fml 1
Seeing as it was at a bar, it would seem likely that everyone was expected to be in costume and frankly it's sometimes hard to tell with what women wear to bars. There's no reason to take that so personally.
uknorob 0
she might just dress inapproprately and they though was dressed up. anyway even though you are an adult you should not go to parties that have that kind of theme or go to bad parties like that. Respect who you are. most guys , if not all guys would only want to take addvantage of you.
pjfromok 0
Why would you go to a "dress up" party and not dress up??? They are going to assume you are dressed up. Fail.
LeStab 4
I was going to say the same thing.
ArielTheMermaid 17
6 took the words right out of my mouth
jillian_xx 0
pretty sure they gave that same thing to everyone. big ******* deal. not a FML or a YDI.
myboner_fml 0
I agree. I hate when non-FMLs are posted.
omnistryder 0
why... it gives everyone a reason to bitch
whitley1031 0
yo, #69, u got big ears xD no offense or anything. and OP, like i said, FYL
quietlytearful 0
agreed#8. they handed the same thing to every one OP. don't be stupid. . .
omnistryder 0
yo #94 I know I have big ears. I pick up satalire radio with these SOB's. it's awesome!
spinx13 0
anybody who wears pirate clothes on a regular basis is cool in my book lol
lindsaylu98 0
how do u know she they didnt look like hooker???
Vehicle 1
So? You got a free drink. lol. They probably gave that to everyone.
050294 0
"You are a pirate!"
Rota 0
The song is looping in my head now. Dammit.
050294 0
You're welcome, ha ha.
cakezorz 0
do what you want cause a pirate is free. you are a pirate!
gethightonight 0
lmao I was just going to ask if she had an eyepatch on :P
Sinisin2010 0
I hope she wore an eyepatch for a thong, that would be the best costume. Best of both worlds!
rooster1144 0
maybe it could of something they handed out to everyone have you ever thought of that
DogmaT_fml 4
well free drink.. the booty is all yours