Today, I found out that I'm not actually pregnant. I've apparently been having a hysterical pregnancy because I want a child so badly. I don't know which was worse, the look of relief on my husband's face or having to send a mass email to inform my family and friends. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Alexa, play "Confusion" by New Order
Today, I found out my husband has been telling everyone he doesn't want a baby. He has been telling me he does. We have been trying for months. I'm now pregnant and confused. FML
Congrats!
Today, I found out my husband is having a baby. Too bad I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, my doctor told me I'm pregnant. Since we've been trying for several years, I called my husband to tell him the good news. Not long after, my doctor called to inform me there'd been a clerical mix-up and I'm not actually pregnant after all. FML
Today, I went to the doctor, because I've been having stomach pains and nausea for weeks. He ended up gravely telling me I'm pregnant. I freaked out and panicked about what my parents would say. Then his laughter reminded me that I'm a guy. A really stupid one. FML
Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, after nearly a month, I found out my wife isn't pregnant after all. She was just screwing around to win a bet with her friends on how long it'd take me to figure out the truth. FML
How very dare you?
Today, I had the abortion my husband and I agreed on, after multiple forms of birth control failed. His family somehow found out, and now they're all mad at us for not telling them I was ever pregnant, with a child we never wanted, and took precautions to avoid creating. FML
Today, I was at the doctors office after throwing up for the past week. My diagnosis? Apparently I'm the first pregnant man. After several minutes of me freaking out and him explaining how it was possible, he told me he was joking and that I'm fine, but my reaction was the best thus far. FML
Dodged a bullet
Today, I went to the doctor's office after getting a positive pregnancy test. She did another one to confirm the result, which came back negative. My husband is wandering around with a great big smile on his face, because he isn't going to "have a rugrat." FML
Today, after months of trying for a baby and telling me how he wants a family and can't wait to have a kid with me, my boyfriend was relieved when I got a negative home test, saying he's not ready for kids yet. I took another test this morning. I'm pregnant. FML
Top comments
GoddessDigi 12
Aww, that really sucks... I remember having to tell everyone there wasn't a baby (but in my case it was a miscarriage). Have you guys tried a fertility clinic? Also, hysterical pregnancy doesn't mean she's a nutjob. She really wants a baby (and some women who don't experience it, as well) so it's not really weird for her to experience this, if she was hoping for it.
TrekkieGirl 0
@ #1, I agree. OP, why the heck would you have already told family and friends that you're expecting if you clearly hadn't gotten a test done? Most people wait a few months before saying anything. Also, if you're husband is relieved that you are not pregnant, that should tell you he's not ready to have kids. Which you shouldn't ignore! There is more to life than having kids. Find a hobby, because your fixation with having a baby is just unhealthy.
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Comments (224)
PimpNasty16 13
I'm pretttttty sure the best way to solve this problem is for you to ******* relax, your body will have a baby when it's ready, that's a little over the top don't ya think?
InfiniteSecret 20
You told everyone that you were pregnant before going to the doctors to make sure that everything was going okay??? Really? Wow you must be really desperate for a child
T1A2Z3 35
Didn't you wait 3 months and have an ultrasound before telling people? I thought you were supposed to do that... And talk to your husband