Today, I found my 5-year-old son prancing around in high heels and cat ears, wearing a thong as a necklace, and waving a riding crop around like a sword. He'd found the box where granny keeps her special outfits that make granddad extra happy on Friday nights. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML
Today, my son decided to run around a supermarket in his underwear, leaving me to chase after him. FML
Today, it's been three weeks since my son found my old red dress and hat outfit in the attic, and like every day since then, he has been putting it on and bursting into rooms without warning and shouting, "NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!" He's almost 18 and going to college in September. FML
Today, I walked in on my teenage son passionately making out with one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML
Today, when I was 14, all I could think about was girls. My son, however, would rather be a "furry", meaning he wears cat ears everywhere, meows and hisses in conversation, and keeps licking his hands and wiping them on his face. FML
Today, I had my boss and his family over for dinner. Our kids played while waiting for dinner to be ready. Just as we were sitting to eat, our 8-year-olds ran out and my son says "Look at Baxter! I found underwear with a tail hole!" They had found my crotchless panties and put them on the dog. FML
Today, my 14-year-old son asked his dog what she was chewing on. It wasn't until he picked it up said, "Is this what I think it is?" that I realized my son was gripping my vibrator. As I took it outside, mortified, he told his sister. FML
Today, I walked in on my mom changing. She was trying on a thong my boyfriend bought me for Valentine's Day. It looks better on her. FML
Today, I realized my wedding ring was missing. Turns out, my son had taken it to give to a girl he likes in the second grade. FML
Today, I playfully drew thick eyebrows on my one-year-old son to make him look like a cartoon villain. He laughed cutely in the mirror as I took some adorable pictures. When my husband saw, he threw such a horrendous fit about boys and makeup, I was reduced to tears. FML
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Top comments
BurnInDemonFire 39
Damn. Horny grandparents are everywhere. It's a good thing mine were so religious when they were alive.
coolmike699 26
Grandson sounds extra happy too. Everyone wins!
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Comments (19)
BurnInDemonFire 39
Damn. Horny grandparents are everywhere. It's a good thing mine were so religious when they were alive.
Glowworm56 27
I absolutely love that he was wearing one of granny's thongs as a necklace!
coolmike699 26
Grandson sounds extra happy too. Everyone wins!
real life problems 26
Poor grandpa only gets it once a week
RichardPencil 32
For some older folks, once a week is plenty. ...or so I’ve heard.
Cody Vertigo Bonthoux 15
for the rest once a week would be considered rookie numbers
silentbabydeer 10
Well let him have fun!! What he doesn’t know isn’t going to hurt him plus he’s got one childhood!!! On another note I hope you’ve either taken picture of him or video taped him.......use it as a blackmail when he gets older.
DogSavior 6
gonna be some useless blackmail
Charlie Given 28
Well they gotta keep it alive in the bedroom some how 😀😎😈
RichardPencil 32
I’ll bet that’s a hell of a lot more than 50 shades of gray!!!
Cody Vertigo Bonthoux 15
she obviously sucks at hiding stuff then
GrumpyGrinch 23
At 5 he is just playing with cat ears and stuff, don't worry!
ViviMage 40
The a photo to blackmail him with later and show his future girlfriends!