Today, I finally tested out my new robot vacuum cleaner. My puppy decided she would test it out too by leaving a brown surprise for it to find, which it did. There are now brown marks in every room of the house. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my dog pooped on the floor, and the Roomba my sweet boyfriend bought me as a housewarming gift, ran over it. FML
Today, I came home to shredded tissues all over the floor. I yelled at my dog, who looked guilty but confused. Turns out, it wasn’t him, it was my robot vacuum cleaner again. It had sucked up a bunch of tissues and napkins from under the couch and then spread them all over the place like confetti. I owe my dog an apology. FML
Today, we got a new Roomba. I set it to clean and came back an hour later to find shit smears all over the floor. Apparently, one of my cats had done his business in the kitchen, and the Roomba had dragged it around the entire first floor of my house. FML
Today, I had to buy a new vacuum cleaner. My previous one stopped working, because apparently, my boyfriend has been using it to suck up our puppy's shit from the floor. FML
Today, I sleepily sprang out of bed to battle a determined off-brand rattly Roomba for the right to clear up a large puddle of cat barf. Guess who won… FML
Today, I bought a new vacuum cleaner after having to go several months without one. Immediately, I wanted to try it out. I must have underestimated how powerful it was, as it sucked up my socks and then broke. FML
Today, I decided to teach my dog not to be scared of the vacuum cleaner. I grab the handle and get it close to her. She runs off and hides behind the couch and pisses everywhere. FML
Today, it was my first night house-sitting my friend's place while he's on vacation. I was reading in bed when I heard scratching downstairs, so I called him in a panic. He told me to check the kitchen. I did. It was his automatic robot vacuum thing, which he'd never thought to mention before, and it was repeatedly trying to climb onto a slipper. FML
Today, I finally broke down and paid someone to clean my condo. Sometime after she finished, my cat threw up. Then my roomba went off, smearing regurgitated mackerel all over the freshly washed floors. There goes $150. FML
Today, my hammerhead of a dog decided to "help" me clean by grabbing the vacuum cord and dragging it across the house, knocking over everything in its path. The house is somehow messier than before I started. FML
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Top comments
david66_fml 20
For some reason I don't think puppies and robots mix
ThrottleJockey 36
The Roomba's or puppies? Clarification is desperately needed here.
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Comments (42)
readingrachel 9
Dr Roomba nooooooo
Lachie20001 21
Are you Geoff Lazer Ramsey?
AssHat87 2
I deeply appreciate this comment lol
maggiefox 25
Oh wow, that's shitty :p
SallySnowflake 23
Pet + Roomba = Shit Zamboni
SirPidles 7
I made the mistake of reading this while drinking from a wide tipped jar... I'm in the hospital for liquid inhalation....
sohigh10 34
They should really add a moisture sensor to that thing, I've seen stories of accidents dragged across the house a little too often.
Fenbrae 17
How do you call a puppy mixed with a robot vaccum? An aroooooomba! I'll let myself out.
Southernthrill69 2
is ops dog named Stanley if so might not wanna call stanley. last time he left shitty work
Wraith1996 3
There is this thing called a dog crate, consider keeping the dog in there if you can't watch it.
jvanevery 19
LOL
readingrachel 9
Aren't puppies amazing