Today, I finally found out why my husband is always so eager and happy to buy me whatever I am craving during my pregnancy. It's because it gives him an excuse to meet up with his mistress and have a quickie. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I learned that my insatiable appetite and sex drive is because I'm 5 months pregnant. I'm married to a woman. We had a threesome one drunken night. FML
Today, I realized why my husband had been seemingly wanting to improve our relationship by sending little texts throughout the day for the last couple of months, asking what I was doing. It was so he could find out when would be the best time to have his girlfriend over and cheat on me. FML
Today, my husband confessed his pregnancy fetish to me, and now wants me to wear a fake belly when we have sex. FML
Today, I found out why my fiancé has been treating me like garbage lately. He thought that me getting fed up and dumping him would save him the unpleasant task of having to confess to the affair he’s been having with his coworker. We’re expecting our baby girl in 4 months. FML
Today, after years of my wife having almost no sex drive, and always insisting on using protection, she suddenly craves unprotected sex like an alcoholic craves booze. I went through her phone and learned why. Yup, she's pregnant, cheated on me since day one, and her scummy side dick skipped town. FML
Today, I found out why my husband is suddenly uninterested in sex. Apparently one of the secretaries at work has finally turned 18, and it's pretty much an open secret among his coworkers that they fuck anywhere from 2 to 5 times a day. FML
Today, I am 10 weeks pregnant and my husband says he needs time for himself. This apparently means he will be romancing and sleeping with other women so he can "relax". FML
Today, my husband complained about my lack of sex drive. Gee, I wonder why, Mr. "Always comes first by humping for a whopping 30 seconds." FML
Today, my husband told me he was going to search from store to store in order to find my birthday gift. What was he really doing? His girlfriend. FML
Today, I came to found out that every time my husband told me that he was on "a work trip", he was actually cheating on me with some other bitch. FML
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Top comments
XDsmileyDX_fml 24
Oh look, there's a nice curb with his name on it.
JOFreeman 13
The interesting part is how did you find out... But still definitely sucks...
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Comments (135)
dDailydDosage 8
Kick him out. File for divorce. Take everything. It's only right. Sorry OP. Him and his mistress are scum.
babyshixo_ 3
That's so messed up. But tell me why I laughed
NamelessFace 22
Maybe you're imagining sticking an ax in OP's husband's face?
Kaygirl2013 13
I'm so sorry OP. I can relate. My fiancee cheated on me just a week after I had our first child. Our baby was still in the NICU because breathing complications. As I was sleeping in the waiting room of Childrens hospital healing from a c- section for a month, he was cheating on me. I hope you find someone who respects you.
kittykittyrun 29
I hate that this FML is from where I live, but the same happened to me with my first son. That guy was out the door pretty fast. Haven't seen him since! Sorry OP.
haydenzare 4
Ballin.
joannvm96 7
One word. Revenge.
lholifield23 12
Dang that really sucks. Hope all goes well
JanieBoo 3
oh wow that's horrible, you need to kick his lying ass out you deserve better there is a special place in hell for him
whitnayfortooh 29
divorce him and take everything he's got
tormcn 26
Seeing this is from Nova Scotia, I laughed. I'm surprised you didn't pull out the frying pan! Ouch.