Today, I finally felt ready to lose my virginity with my boyfriend. Unfortunately he was too embarrassed to go and buy some condoms, and suggested in all seriousness that we use a sandwich bag instead. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while finally about to make love with my long-term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I decided it was time to lose our virginity. After our clothes were removed, we spent 30 minutes trying to figure out how to actually have sex, and eventually gave up. FML
Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML
Today, the condom slipped off, because my boyfriend refuses to admit that he needs to use smaller condoms. FML
Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML
Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML
Today, while my boyfriend was packing for his annual hunting trip, I saw him slip a box of condoms into his bag. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were trying to have sex for the first time. Not only did he struggle for five minutes to put on a condom (repeatedly snapping himself in the balls), but he then had to ask me "which hole" to put it in. I'm dating a thirty-four year old virgin. FML
Today, I spent three hours getting ready to go out to lunch with my boyfriend, only to find out he meant we're going to the McDonald's inside Wal-Mart so he can also pick up condoms. FML
Today, I finally felt ready to have sex for the first time, with my boyfriend of nearly 8 months. When I told him, things became intimate and pants came off. He then looked at me and said, "Yeah, I can't do this." The rest of the night was spent in awkward silence. FML
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Top comments
Kobwebs 19
If he's too embarrassed to buy condoms, he's definitely not ready for sex.
Wersome 13
Sorry Op but if either of you are too embarrassed to buy condoms then you are not ready for sex.
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Comments (177)
Violenna 14
I'd say you're sandwiched between a rock and a hard place.
HookemHorns21 7
Tell him to use a roast beef sandwich instead if ya know what I mean ?
gregnc_fml 18
Why not use cellophane wrap or better yet aluminum foil rather than a sandwich bag. I don't think either of you are ready for sex yet.
kendalbear 16
And I'm sure he'll be too embarrassed to be in the room when you give birth if you went through with it.
militarybrat 21
Yep hes not ready to have sex. I will say we used ceran wrap. Only because people would tell if we went to stores to get condoms. And tell the wrong people. Even after 18 parents can make your life hell.
thatsme293 28
Look into this. Is he trying to get you pregnant on purpose? This could be sociopathic behavior op
Tannasgh 22
No..NO...HELL NO.
greenwaveguy1289 8
Guys, don't lie, we've all been there at least once.
superfoxman 8
you should have said no to the sandwich bag and gave him a trash bag and said hefty hefty hefty.
Kristen320 21
You two sound too young for sex then.