Today, I fell asleep at my bus stop following a long day at work. I woke up to a homeless man giggling after he had clipped dozens of clothespins to my clothes, shoes, and hair in my sleep. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I fell asleep with my luggage at a bus terminal. Upon waking up, I found that someone had opened my bags and stolen all my socks. FML
Today, I was on the train to work. I was up late the night before, causing me to doze off. When I woke up, I was at my station. I stood up, went to walk out of the door and fell flat on my face on a platform full of people. Someone had tied my shoelaces together. FML
Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on a bus. When I awoke suddenly, half of the bus was staring at me, with some people chuckling and smiling. I have no idea what I did. FML
Today, while on the bus, I began to fall asleep. Suddenly, a man next to me started laughing very loudly, scaring me and jolting me out from my nap. I was so scared, I reflexively punched the girl in front of me in the face. I was pinned down by three other men while the cops were called. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the bus and when I woke up, I found out that I missed my stop by ten stops and I was on the last bus of the night. And, to make matters worse, a drunk hobo was sitting next to me with a beer in one hand and was rubbing my leg with the other. FML
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the train after a long day at work. I woke up when someone gently tapped my shoulder. I opened my eyes to see people smiling at me. I'd been snoring so loud that the conductor had said, “Please wake Sleeping Beauty up, this is the last stop.” I had drooled on my tie and missed my actual stop by an hour. FML
Today, after a long day at work, I fell asleep in my living room. When I woke up, I saw a man leaving my bedroom wearing my pajamas, and I started screaming as he casually left. The cops came and apparently he's mentally ill. He truly believed it was his house. FML
Today, I went to watch a movie. In the middle of it, I accidentally fell asleep. Minutes later, I awoke on a stranger's shoulder. He was caressing my hair. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of scissors. My mom was cutting my hair while I was asleep. FML
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Top comments
NotGabe 28
That's an innocent way to have fun. c:
WeiXinLun 16
That. Is. Hilarious.
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Comments (94)
eddeeezzyy 19
At least they weren't mouse traps.
TheOnlyMizLiv 22
Agreed, this could totally be worse! I like his sense of humor.
JennaNGood 21
I was going to say something along the lines of at least he didn't pee on you, or do anything extremely horrible.
NeatNit 33
some homeless people just deserve to be homeless. btw, how come we never see any homeless women?
Ambient25 25
If you stopped spending all your time on the computer and actually went outside you might run into one at some point...
perdix 31
#16, before you get too comfortable, I'm guessing the homeless dude "pre-treated" the clothespins with some of his bodily fluids before the clip-fest. Urine would be among the least objectionable of them.
cryssycakesx3 23
"you never see any handsome homeless"
perdix 31
#36, they are out there, but you are not missing much. Of course, offering to "help" hot women on the street is frowned upon in most jurisdictions.
awkwardloveannie 28
@36 some people are homeless due to mental illness and other due to being lazy, the lazy ones do deserve it.
perdix 31
#66, but wouldn't you think laziness to that extreme extent would be symptomatic of a mental illness?
Gingerette 8
You've got something there, perdix.
Odis12 11
Some of them actually make better money begging than most people who flip burgers all day. I've seen more than one turn a corner and jump into a Cadillac. Assuming someone is off to a bad life just because they look it is a bad way to judge.
mbuck87 19
You've seen more than one homeless person get up and jump into a Cadillac? Are you ******* kidding me? What a shit lie to tell. Why would you bother making that up? Everyone's heard the story that their mates told them about that homeless guy who is actually really rich but decided he would just give up all worldly possessions one day, but I highly doubt you have seen 'more than 1' get into their Caddy.
WeiXinLun 16
That. Is. Hilarious.
boating_guy 33
But so nasty. What I wonder is...where did he get all of them?
Sports_guy3 28
Same here.
JAKASS200 5
Op let him have his fun. Atleast he didn't do anything else. Although it is disgusting, homeless people need a little fun in their life, too
flea_of_death 23
How exactly is it disgusting? I find it quite amusing =)
buddy_J 16
All you people saying this is disgusting give a good reason why. Is it because he's homeless? Because that's not a reason at all. At least he's not heartless like you
marulicko 19
So cute :')
NotGabe 28
That's an innocent way to have fun. c:
xSonic 9
Innocent to you. . .Lol but I wouldn't want some hobo doing that shit to my mother.
buddy_J 16
You are a heartless bitch #28
FreakoHolm 6
Could have been worse. Could have been raped. Could have been murdered. Could have been burned to ashes. Could have been spread out in the sea. Could have been swallowed by fish. Could have been captured, fried and eaten. Could have been digested. Could have been in someone's shit. Could have... That's it, I'm done.
Justice_Beaver 13
I wonder if OP got off the bus with the pins hanging off of him, lol.
sydstoomuch 19
Her*
Jemm_fml 29
OP was at the bus stop not in the bus
Justice_Beaver 13
Oh, oops.
Why_Not_Guy 9
I think this is proof that some people just never grow up.
buddy_J 16
And thank god they don't
AnOriginalName 19
Of all the things a homeless man could've done to you while you were sleeping in public, that doesn't seem like one of the worst things that could happen.
Ali_Br_fml 33
Yes, I think OP is lucky that's ALL that happened to her too. I'm Not saying ydi, because I am guilty of dosing off on the NYC train when I leave work super late, but for women, it's really dangerous to fall asleep. I'm not saying Men can't get mugged & raped too... My mom just always puts the fear of traveling home @ 2am in me "You could get raped & killed" "make sure you're aware of all of your surroundings" etc, because that's the time when people are leaving parties drunk off their asses, and will do crazy stuff to you, especially if you fell asleep... So you're lucky that's all that happened, especially since you weren't even on the bus yet where other people could have intervened if things got violent instead of this homeless guy's prank. (I will really try to work on shortening my comment length...)
dingleberrysteve 6
guys can get raped and mugged
EyeOfTheSt0rm 10
How did you sleep through all of that?
Mshrodes 13
Some people are just like that I guess. I for one could sleep through a bloody battle. Not that great when you can't even hear your alarm clock sometimes.
carelessxdanger 9
some people can sleep anywhere or through anything. i envy those people. i could never do that. i'm always convinced i will fart lol
Jemm_fml 29
You do fart in your sleep. We all do. There's no escaping the escaping gas!
Nyx_fml 23
Doing that must have required some skill, specially on the hair. I bet he has a personal record of how many clothespins he can put before waking the other person up.
QueenD11 9
Well at least the guy had something to laugh and smile about!
barbsillvy 10
It's kind of cute the way he was enjoying your company! It's a new friend you got there! Lol