Today, while on the bus, I began to fall asleep. Suddenly, a man next to me started laughing very loudly, scaring me and jolting me out from my nap. I was so scared, I reflexively punched the girl in front of me in the face. I was pinned down by three other men while the cops were called. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on a bus. When I awoke suddenly, half of the bus was staring at me, with some people chuckling and smiling. I have no idea what I did. FML
Today, I got on the bus. Before I could make it to a free seat, the driver hit the gas, and the sudden movement caused me to stumble and accidentally grab onto another passenger for support. She didn't appreciate this, accused me of molesting her, and got me thrown back off. FML
I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo
Today, while sitting on the bus the man sitting slightly above and behind me leaned over my seat. All I heard was someone deeply inhaling in to my hair. I turned around and slapped him. Everyone saw what he did, but no one defended me while I was being thrown off the bus for assault. FML
Today, I fell asleep in class. As a joke, my professor used an airhorn to wake me up. I got so freaked out that I punched the girl next to me in the face. She got knocked out. FML
Today, while on the bus, I took out my breath spray. The elderly lady beside me thought it was pepper spray. She panicked and started screaming, which culminated in the man near her punching me in the jaw. FML
Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML
Leech
Today, while on the bus, an elderly man fell asleep on my shoulder. He looked sweet, so I didn't push him off. A few minutes later, the bus jolted and his head slipped down into my breasts. I'm pretty sure you don't smile like that when you're really asleep. FML
Today, while I was on the bus, my foot fell asleep. When we arrived at my stop, I stood up and limped to the front of the bus. As I walked down the steps, I tripped, fell, and smashed my nose into the ground. The driver just laughed and drove away. FML
Family jewels
Today, while on the bus, I had to stand as all the seats were taken. I was standing behind a group of small girls who were messing around with their bags. As they were swinging them, one hit me square in the nuts with her elbow. The girl said, “Wise up, I hardly touched you.” I missed my stop. FML
Today, I was on the train when I fell asleep. Everything would have been fine but I was suddenly jerked awake by the very loud sound of my own fart, followed by the stares of many strangers. FML
Top comments
strandy 2
Poor girl. Was she okay?
SavageOranges 0
Sorry but I LOL'd! :P
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (88)
SavageOranges 0
Sorry but I LOL'd! :P
ChrisSG 0
ydi for punching a girl.. shame on you, OP
valri3 0
Happy Halloween!
jewban 3
I had when people laugh so loudly on he phone it's so annoying I would have punch the guy in the face haha
Quidikic 9
Jewban, I have no ******* idea what you just said...
suppressed08 2
(my first comment hasn't appeared..) Why is it a YDI because he hit a girl? 'Yeah, so he woke up and punched this guy in the face, but it's ok because most guys can take it.' Are you mental? It's not alright if anyone gets hit, not just girls.
xBangOut 4
I also have " hit random girl in the face when anything unexpected happens" reflexes.
rawrjessi 0
me too xD
imacatcher 10
You make zero sense!!!!!
MichellinMan 20
YOU KNOW WHAT? **** YOU ALL. NO ONE WILL SEE THIS.
Scarshadow101 6
Really? They're the ones that "make zero sense"? What are you, a kindergartener?
strandy 2
Poor girl. Was she okay?
020266t 5
oh shut up weirdo
alex112094 5
lol win!!!!!
ManlyDunsparce 3
OP has the ability to Falcon punch her. so... Sadly the girl has been vaporised.
scooter69 0
damn girl!! those are some crazy reflexes lol
timma90 4
OP is a dude. :P
Ever123 0
It's a guy
dragonaair 5
Falling asleep, on the bus? Wow...
RebelHeart7 0
you should come to China. you'd be surprise with the quantities of chineses sleeping in the bus
supersparta4300 0
I used to do it all the time, it's really easy to do when you have gym class combined with boring classes and you stay up late smoking weed and chilling with your peeps
dickster 0
Supersparta, yea... That's a great way to spend your nights...
Emmamazing 26
Chineses?
EightInchNails 9
Your choice of physical contact was met with the utmost negativity.
ke59100 1
ha!
grabblebyk 1
thats what you get for not controlling your reflexes. lol. was that an oxymoron? probably not. but i tried. fragment sentences. are fun.
nerdface89 2
maybe
xninix_fml 36
Lol you can't control your reflexes. That's why they are called that :p
zebrapattern 6
how the hell is making a fist, pulling it back then pushing your fist out directly at someone's head a reflex- instantly after you were just unconscious?
sipher16 0
pdsd I've seen guys come out of sleep brandishing knives. one of my buddies tried to strangle me when I woke him up screaming "who sent you!?!?" we laugh about it now but it was purely a reflex.
crowbar87 0
don't you meant PTSD?
MzKitty83 0
my husband has woken up grabbing my arm and shaking me, or he hops up sure he's late for work, one time he even was kicking me and trying to choke me, all after he deployed but those are NOT normal responses for non marines. so op u probably should look into some therapy for your unnatural fight over flight reflex
MzKitty83 0
ok I should say those are not normal responses for people who are non military or abuse victims or trauma survivors
Rallred32 20
11 all you have to do is clench your fist a little bit and swing your arm. If that's not a reflex, I don't know what is.
domolovesyoshi 33
it is if he/she has PTSD
Mariax_fml 2
Hahaha, made my day x)
ImaginaryFoe 1
Was she turned towards you for some reason? How did you punch her in the face if she was sitting in front of you? And how long is your arm?
fricknugget 3
some buses r like that. i went on lots of em in rome :P
alipod 11
great that u didn't fart. that man would even laugh louder