Today, I faked back pain to get out of sex with my wife. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Actor's Studio
Today, I was having sex with my wife, when she fell asleep. She then woke up and started moaning, clearly faking an orgasm. FML
I suck
Today, I sucked so bad that I faked an injury during a football game to get out of playing. FML
Today, I had to lie to my therapist about my sex life to make myself feel better. FML
Today, I realized that sex with my husband has gotten so boring that I'd rather fake an orgasm than let him continue. FML
Today, I woke up with the flu. My wife thinks I'm faking it so we don't have to go on date night, even though I've been on the toilet all day. FML
Pull yourself together
Today, I slipped on some ice and wrecked my back. When my husband and I went to go to bed, he begged me to take one of the pain pills left over from his recent surgery. Not so I could feel better and get some rest, but so he could have sex. FML
Fake it til you make it
Today, I decided to fake it when my husband and I were making love. Afterwards, he told me that he could tell my head was "really in the game" and felt a stronger connection with me now and was glad I opened up and "let go" with him. FML
Today, while I was fooling around with my girlfriend, she hurt her hand. It obviously wasn't very serious, so I told her to stop faking it. She responded, "Wanna know what I actually fake? My orgasms." FML
Ouchie
Today, I felt a horrible pain while having sex with my wife, and I had to stop. I thought it was a hernia or something, but she called me a liar and accused me of everything from not finding her attractive, to me cheating on her. It turned out I had appendicitis. She still won't apologize. FML
Deception
Today, I found out my husband was faking his leg injury. I caught him out and about walking just fine, hand in hand with another woman. I’ve been caring for him, holding down the bills, and taking him to an "at home" chiropractor for the past 7 months. FML
Top comments
kzxvazure 0
just say no....
HSOMGF 5
That back pain is probably related to your lack of spine. And really, **** HER life. She deserves better.
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Comments (207)
muffinXmonster 12
She really that bad?
charvisioku 22
Must be a shit marriage if you can't even say "I don't feel like it today"...
sweetmama88 6
I think you should tell the truth , before it goes too far. She deserves the truth .
perdix 31
Another theory: You don't want to have sex with your wife because it might make your girlfriend jealous. Is that it?
brookedenardo 4
this is very sad. solution: COMMUNICATE. that is what every relationship is about. explain to her what she is doing that you don't like, or tell her what you do like during sex. how can she fix it if she doesn't know shes doing anything wrong? HELP her fix it. i hope this helps. :)
Skullcrusher 5
Does anybody give a rat's ass?
linkinpark98 24
Nope!
silentblack 0
Wow is it that bad
linkinpark98 24
Why not try and switch it up a bit? That should get a spark flowing. ;)
groupleader 7
Does matter...Didn't have sex!!! Fail!
beezleboss2010 3
Damn....must be pretty bad