Today, I drove home in my brand new car, hoping to surprise my girlfriend. She came out the house laughing, saying how funny it was, and how I look like a "twollop" in it. Then in all seriousness, she asked me when I was getting my "actual car" back from the garage. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I drove my ex-boyfriend home from dropping his car at the garage for new tires. On the way, I drove past my house where my boyfriend was sitting in the driveway ready to surprise me. My boyfriend watched us drive by. FML
Today, I asked my girlfriend what her favorite quality about me was. Her answer, "Your car." FML
Today, my friend got her first car. I bought mine three weeks ago and haven't started making payments. She came straight from the dealership to pick me up. She backed into my car. FML
Today, I was on a first date with this girl I've been talking to. I met her and she came with me so I could park my car in the student lot. On the way back, I saw a beat up car with its window duct taped up and exclaimed "Haha! Look at that piece of junk." It was her car. FML
Today, I bought my very first car that I spent years saving for. A few hours after I signed all the papers, I let my boyfriend go for a test drive. He totaled it. FML
Today, I met up with my ex-girlfriend for coffee. It’s been months, and I was planning on flexing on her with my new car. Turns out, she also got a new car, and it’s newer, cleaner, faster, and better on gas. FML
Today, I called my boyfriend to tell him how excited I was to drive 12 hours to see him and his new house. His girlfriend answered. FML
Today, was my 16th birthday and I was supposed to be surprised with a new car. I have overheard my parents talking about bringing it home tonight while I was at a friend's house. We snuck back to my house to see them bring my car home. All I saw was my Dad crash my new car into a street lamp. FML
Today, I proudly drove my new car to work, feeling on top of the world. As I parked, I noticed everyone in the lot staring at me. I smiled and waved, thinking they were admiring my car. It wasn't until I got to my desk that my boss informed me I'd dragged an orange traffic cone under my car the entire way to the office. FML
Today, I borrowed my mom’s BMW to impress my new girlfriend. I'd told her that I owned an accounting firm, so I had to look the part. Today was also the day someone decided to rear-end us. That someone happened to be my boss at Burger King. Let’s just say, the cat’s out of the bag and I’m single now. FML
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Top comments
metallakes 0
that would be a noun...
immafiremylaser 0
What's a twollop? Is it a kind of fish?
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Comments (81)
crownme 0
I agree w. #3 But that totally sucks for you
24788 7
lol, twollop. I'd just laugh at her for using that word.
stiles_fml 0
twollop.... is that a pommy thing to say agree with #12
stiles_fml 0
#7 actually looked it up in the dictionary
stiles_fml 0
should of said "this car was for u and im getting the ferrari for my uncle"
Slappy_Tackle 0
Twollop? It's trollop! Is your girlfriend an English person with a speach impediment? Or are you dating Johnathon Ross? (Wossy). Either way your girlfriend is a tool. YDI for being with her
rachelbrianna25 0
what a bitch! if my boyfriend brought home a new car, even if i didn't like it, I would be nice about it. ouch, that sucks.
noordinarylove 0
He probably drives a Toyota Prius. Those cars do look like UGG boots at the ankle. If not that, he's probably driving one of those Smart Cars. Haha. She's right. You do look ridiculous.
NoReallyFMyLife 0
I second #18. If it was a prius, YDI. If not, your girlfriend is a bitch. Either way, you lose.
CodeMonkey123 0
Your Girlfriend is a bitch for not noticing this YDI!!!!!