Today, I discovered that my cat recently had explosive diarrhea, and couldn't make it to the litterbox in time. I discovered this when I stepped in the very, very fresh poop with my bare feet. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML
Today, I discovered my cat is bathroom shy when I accidentally walked in on him relieving himself. He jumped about 3 feet in the air and bolted out, launching feces and pee all over the bathroom, hallway, and my shoes. FML
Today, I woke up, put on my fuzzy socks, walked down my hallway, and stepped in cat vomit. I took off my now wet socks, continued walking down the hallway, and stepped barefoot in cat shit. FML
Today, like any other day I struggled to put my boots on, went to pee and noticed my pants were covered in what looked like a green dust. I touched it, sniffed it, and it smelled utterly horrendous. So I took my boots off again only to find that one of my cats had took a dump in one of them. FML
Today, I woke to the smell of poop in my apartment. I went to investigate and found out a cat had pooped in my living room. I don’t have a cat. FML
Today, I was pet sitting for a friend. As soon as I walked in the door, I stepped in dog poop. I took off my shoes to clean them, then stepped in cat pee in my socks. FML
Today, I came home to find that my dog had taken a dump on my bed. I quickly put on my house shoes to avoid possibly stepping on any other of his turds. I felt something squish all over my right foot. He'd also taken a dump in my house shoe. FML
Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML
Today, I was walking down the hallway when I stepped in an ice cold pile of cat vomit. I was barefoot. FML
Today, I stepped in dog shit, barefoot, in my own bathroom. The dog had been outside for two hours earlier, and I'd watched him take a dump. Apparently he was saving some for when he got back in the house. FML
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Top comments
KY_Jelly 10
At least with bare feet you can wash it off quickly. If you were wearing socks, you would've had to do laundry. Either way, this sucks.
Lionesse 15
Humans shit too. Is that a reason to not be around people? I was going to write "Is that a reason not to own humans" but I caught myself in time because I realized owning people is illegal now.
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Comments (110)
wildcat90 1
KILL THE CAT!!!
dontpanic_fml 32
Seriously! Please give the diarrhea stories a rest for a while!
karlee333 11
As a dog owner, all I can say is I'm sure glad I don't have to deal with a litter box, lol.
Lizzy500 16
Very very fresh? You mean like still warm?
kwyk 23
Try cat biscuits next time. Sushi might not agree with cats at the best of times.
Sputnikspak 13
Actually, cats are obligate carnivores. They'll do way better on a diet of raw meats (and bones and organs) than they'll do on a diet of Friskies.
Hpixiee 23
Well that was vividly disturbing.
KiddNYC1O 22
That's all it takes?? Lol
iammeorami 25
awesomesauce
Soph0725 8
Reading this stuff really makes me happy that I don't have an animal ._.
dontpanic_fml 32
There seem to be a lot of intestinal maladies going around...
PhilSnake22 13
It seems the diarrhea is always explosive on FML...