Today, I discovered my cat is bathroom shy when I accidentally walked in on him relieving himself. He jumped about 3 feet in the air and bolted out, launching feces and pee all over the bathroom, hallway, and my shoes. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I discovered that my cat recently had explosive diarrhea, and couldn't make it to the litterbox in time. I discovered this when I stepped in the very, very fresh poop with my bare feet. FML
Today, my cat fell into the toilet, jumped out, and ran straight to hide in my bed. FML
Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML
Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me because he loves toilets. Everyone was sleeping so I went pee but didnt flush. My cat jumped onto the seat and fell in. I had to lift him out and then wash him. He hates water though, so I was scratched by my cat who was dripping with my own pee. FML
Today, while I was on the toilet, my cat managed to climb up behind me, slip and then grip itself to my bare ass. In my haste to get away from the cat, I pooped on the toilet without noticing. Until I sat back down. FML
Today, I woke up to go pee and my cat followed me into the bathroom as usual. Then, in a not so usual fashion, she tried to jump from the sink to the top of the toilet, missed, and fell into the bowl while I was peeing. I'm scratched in a bad place, I have urine to clean up off the bathroom floor, and a traumatized cat. FML
Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML
Today, my cat pooped in the shower. How did I find out? I didn't see the poop when I got in. I slipped in it, and smacked my head on the tile wall. FML
Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML
Today, I went to clean my cat's litter box, not realizing she was in it. As I lifted the top half of the litter box up, she sprayed me with piss. FML
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Top comments
naaddzz 14
Next time you should knock OP
buckstop1 37
No need to get all pissy about it OP!
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Comments (52)
guii_fml 24
Arent cats just wonderful
buckstop1 37
No need to get all pissy about it OP!
naaddzz 14
Next time you should knock OP
primadonna9396 16
If someone knocks while my one cat is ********, she'll get scared and run away to her hiding spot while dropping a few turds on the way over. Thankfully it's not the same cat that takes such foul smelling dumps that it actually wakes me up at night whenever he drops a deuce. Such majestic creatures.
JustinJK 21
That's shitty bahahahahahahahahahaha Muahahahahahaha
taterrtots 25
you tried. you failed
booze_n_bitches 37
Are any of the FML team here...? Alan...? Can we remove this user, please? I think you should write in your rule book that using the "shitty" pun will receive a lifetime ban.
freddygasman 18
strrrrrrrriiiiiike two
muarif 19
MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
deathrise007 22
That sucks OP. Hopefully it wasn't too gross. Next time you should knock!
bitchs_and_hoes 20
Aww poor kitty
_ravens_ 11
Ladies, please stay seated for the entire performance
booze_n_bitches 37
And gentleman, it's not as big as you think. Please stand closer to the toilet.
muarif 19
Apply some toilet water on the burnt area.
DrHeartSurgeon 15
Strait up savage
mccrightp 29
I have the litter box cover in another large box. It keeps the smell and it might give your cat some privacy.
Eleora 19
Might as well sell the house. lol jk. Cat piss stinks terribly! Bet you had fun cleaning that up.
Tripartita 45
This is why I just leave my cat tied up and in the litter box next to a food dish. I use a similar strategy (and a bit of clothesline) to ensure loved ones cannot abandon me. If you're willing to fi—oh, hold on, somebody is knocking on my door, and I can hear sirens…