This is a Nearly FML. It’s an FML, nearly. It got positive votes from the users, by wasn’t approved by our team.
Today, I decided to tell my husband our marriage was over after I found out that he'd not only been stealing from me, but he'd also been downloading child porn. He then asked if we could break up but live in the same house so I could help pay his bills. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my wife told me she wanted a divorce. She also confessed that she has been cheating on me with my best friend for 10 years. I appreciated the honesty, but was slightly upset considering we have only been married for 9 years. FML
Today, I bailed my soon to be ex-husband out of jail after he'd been arrested for soliciting. Soliciting an undercover cop. FML
Today, my fiancée woke up from a nightmare where I cheated on her. She has so far successfully gotten into my personal and work e-mails, and all my social media. I'm not sure if I'm worse at picking a wife or at picking passwords. FML
Today, I got a call from a girl I dated long ago, who cheated on me and got pregnant by another guy, or so we thought. Turns out it isn't his, and she is taking me to court for child support. FML
Today, I found out that the same police officer who has arrested me twice has been sleeping with my wife. FML
Today, while my husband and I were arguing, he walked away in the middle of my sentence yelling, "Remember babe, you're only my current wife!" FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting to surprise him when he got home from work. I was laying in his bed when he called to tell me we were over. I couldn't leave before he got home. FML
Today, at a red light, my mom started to tell me that she and my dad hadn't had sex in months, that they "probably won't bounce back from this one," and are most likely getting a divorce. FML
Today, my husband recorded me getting out of bed and sleepwalking all the way into the backyard and straight into our pool. He was too busy giggling like a schoolgirl to help me out. FML
Today, I turned off my boyfriend's Xbox while he was playing because I wanted to talk to him about getting more serious with our relationship. As I did so, he said, "That's not the only thing you just turned off" and promptly broke up with me. FML
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Top comments
meirasanya 10
Report him to the police! Stealing from you is illegal enough, but downloading child **** as well! He won't need to worry about bills from jail. It's also safer for children if he's locked away.
ihateexams 0
Anonymously call the police and report him for downloading child pornography. If there's any evidence on his computer, that will probably be enough to prosecute.
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Comments (129)
hartrum 0
get rid of that creepy messed up loser who steals and jacks off to child **** report that pervert
LennyComa 39
Send the peado to the penn and let the convict code do the rest
oakland43 6
chilmos
iteenlovequotes 19
He sounds disgusting and stupid Kick him to the curb!!
Mademoiselle_fml 34
I really hope you didn't have any children around him. Hope he gets a max sentence
sexynarwhal 6
sounds like you married a /b/tard.
xxEternalRain 13
Kick his ass out and let him suffer
projectem7 14
" i just found out sone really crazy shit. Let me just post it on FML"
littlexlune 16
Turn his ass in, dummy.
RaynbowRebel 2
I'd tell him nooooo way