Today, I couldn't figure out what was worse: accidentally dropping my car keys into the bottom of a filthy park lake, or getting a fishhook through my toenail in an attempt to retrieve them. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I dropped my keys in the sewer. The spare ones are inside my locked car. FML
Today, I shut my finger in the car door. The door locked. Then I dropped the keys on the ground and couldn't reach them. FML
Today, I tried to get a piece of glass out of my big toe. After an hour of poking and prodding, I finally got it out only for it to fall on the floor where I couldn't find it. Not five minutes later, I stepped on it again. FML
Today, I rescheduled my doctor's appointment for a tetanus shot to go camping with my friends. While running on a path at the camp site, I stepped on a rusty nail that went right through my shoe and into my foot. Maybe I should have kept my appointment. FML
Today, I dropped my keys in the drain. Thankfully, my new flat mate generously offered his help to reach the keys via flower pot. FML
Today, I lost a sewing needle in the carpet. No worries, my big toe found it. FML
Today, I stepped out of my car and slipped on a fresh coating of ice on the ground. I tried to catch myself by grabbing the car on my way down, but unfortunately, I was trying to grab with the hand that was holding my car keys. I key-scratched my own car. FML
Today, I dropped my keys in the toilet. While in the kitchen looking for something to fish them out with, I heard a door slam. My sister had to use the bathroom and didn’t see my keys in the toilet before sitting down. Lucky me, I caught her just as she was about to flush. FML
Today, I was at a family dinner, which had gone into meltdown after my aunt said something sarcastic about my mother's drinking. I went out for some fresh air and stumbled about in the dark, unaware of the fact that a pool was being dug. I fell into the huge hole and lost a shoe. FML
Today, I dropped some food on the floor and picked it back up, took a bite, and quickly realised it had toenail cuttings in it. I never cut my toenails in my dining room. FML
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Top comments
camoney 4
definitely the toenail
cudi504 4
definitely the fish hook through the toenail *shudder*
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Comments (177)
synonymous 1
Through your toenail? How long are your toenails? Something about this sounds a little fishy... You must have incredibly long nails to have avoided a fish hook also piercing your toe. I think inadvertently admitting to having long, hobo toenails is the best part of this FML.
maliakaulitz1000 0
XD HAHA DEFINITLY THE FISHOOK!!! haha wow wut a classic!!
sweet_candy_ 17
I would say both suck.
twisted54 1
how bout that infection you're about to have...
izzy7 11
At least it was through your nail and not your toe? I hope you got your keys back after all the trouble. :-(
LizzJizz 16
Ouch, sounds painful D:
musicalmikaela 0
the lake because you don't go through any pain...plus you can just sanitize your hand...pain bad....going outside your comfort zone because you need to get your car keys in that scenario that's ok....so I say lake..^-^
JRFaceless 8
Is that even a question
BellaMarta 19
toenail
HahaYDI 0
The Holocaust.