Today, I caught some perverts sitting in a car in front of my house, spying on my neighbors. When they refused to leave, I grabbed a baseball bat and they sped off in a hurry. Later, those same perverts came back to arrest my neighbors for drug trafficking. I had threatened cops. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I awoke to the sound of my neighbors attacking my car with a baseball bat accusing me of calling the cops on them. I did call the cops on them, after they screamed at me last night, drunkenly, to call the cops for them because they thought they were being robbed. FML
Today, I called the cops on a couple who was fighting outside my window at 4 a.m. They hid in the bushes when the cops came, came back out when they left, and started fighting again. FML
Today, I hit a parked car and fled because I was so scared. Four hours later, the cops showed up at my house so I broke down crying confessing everything. Turns out, they weren't there about the car I hit. They were alerting me about the string of burglaries in my neighborhood recently. FML
Today, I found out the identity of the pervert who's been staring at me through my bedroom window in the late hours of the night. My parents and I decided to set out a trap for 'him' instead of reporting to our local cop. Turns out, we caught my 37 year-old neighbor in the act. He's the cop. FML
Today, I was under a building overhang to avoid getting drenched by the rain while waiting for the bus. Apparently that corner is notorious for drug dealing, I found this out when a man angrily demanded his drugs and chased me half a block. FML
Today, my dad forced me to take part in a pathetic act of revenge against our neighbors, who keep parking their 4x4 in front of our house. He made me stand watch while he kept trying to slash their tires. An hour later, we were waiting for my mom to bail us out of jail. FML
Today, I was sitting behind some bushes in the dark enjoying the view, when some cops came and confiscated my night-vision goggles, then warned me for acting like a "creepy perv." FML
Today, after taking my crush to the train station late at night, I sat in a local park alone with my thoughts for a while. Two cops appeared out of nowhere and started searching me for drugs and weapons, asking me questions for a good 30 minutes. Not the kind of action I expected tonight. FML
Today, my thundercunt of a neighbor, who's hated me since I moved in, called the cops on me. He told them he saw me shooting up on drugs. I'm diabetic and was injecting insulin, which he could only have seen by spying on me through my living room window. FML
Today, I had to call the police to get my crazy stalker of a neighbor out of my house. When the police arrived, I found out that she was friends with the officer. FML
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Top comments
tgm0112 0
You had no way of knowing if they were doing their job right. FYL
kath91 0
You weren't to know, if they were sitting in front of your house they deserved it.
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Comments (184)
saunder 0
haha why fml its awsome man!
epikz 0
smart cops for not over reacting and arresting you lol not everyday you see smart cops
Nick86 0
Well, you had no idea of knowing. At least they didn't arrest you too!
gagliface 3
hahahaha. FML makes my day. and not just because of funny FML's. Reading people's comments makes it so much better because everyone gets SO worked up about shit. lolz. lighten up :)
aaaaa12345_fml 0
they wear ******* towels on their heads and have bombs strapped around their chests. also, most of them have long beards and sand falls out of their shoes where they walk.
userperson 0
Presuming no other fallout, that's neither your fault, nor FML, that's just cool. You did the right thing. They could've been trespassing perverts. Turns out they were people conspiring to kidnap & imprison the neighbors. You got to scare them away once, a good day. Sadly, if you'd done that when they came to kidnap them, They would have F'd-Your-Life
annaofwisconsin 0
At least you're a good neighbor. And it's something i would've done if 2 guys were sitting in a car just trying to stare into my neighbors' windows.
rosiegrewup 0
Good on you for being community spirited.
oldskoolman85 0
Hey how many people can say they threatened two cops with a baseball bat and get away with it. This isn't a FYL at all.
isantorin 0
this. :D
triplethreat13 0
you're not in any trouble. if they didn't tell you they were cops and you had a good reason to threaten them, they can't do anything to you.