Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
My little buddy
Today, I walked in on my husband in our room completely naked. At first I thought he was waiting for me so we could have sex. He hadn't seen me yet, so I started to undress too to surprise him. Then I saw that he had drawn a face on his penis and he was talking to it. FML
Today, I walked in on my husband jacking off to a photo of himself. FML
Today, my husband called me to the bedroom to show me something. This "something" was him demonstrating his seemingly well-trained ability to accurately type out a sentence on my phone using nothing but his erect penis. FML
Today, I watched my boyfriend have a full on conversation with his penis. He also talks to his penis nicer than he talks to me. FML
Today, I walked in on my grandfather smiling at his penis. FML
Classic Dave
Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating into the kitchen sink. FML
Great chat!
Today, my mom caught me talking to my penis. FML
Communication tool
Today, my husband let me know he felt I was ignoring him by jabbing me in the right ear with his erect penis while I was Skyping with my mum overseas. FML
Revealing
Today, my husband called me from work just to chat. He asked what I had been up to today. I was feeling frisky so I told him all about how I had gotten horny, watched a porno and masturbated earlier. It wasn't until I heard the hoots and laughter that I realized he had me on speakerphone. FML
Close
Today, my husband decided it's completely fine to walk around the house with his penis out in front of his mom. FML
Top comments
sjisje 0
did the penis talk back?
allenrotstein 0
c'mon, this is kinda funny..
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (191)
thisispointless 2
he's giving it a pep talk:D
lenluigi 6
less talking more...... hehehe don't worry lol
JustHayden 5
Talk to it, and it will grow. Sort of like a plant I guess...
TheNicce01 14
so... and you havent talked to vag or bewbs
WarriorOmen 25
Pish. I talk to my boyfriends all the time, I like to give it names. And use different voices on it. Mind you, I'm also sorta crazy,so I might not be a good basis.
Dmeijer87 15
Dear penis, i don't think i like you anymore...
Venister 11
Was he encouraging it to grow?
ChoolyBooly 32
I suppose sometimes you need to have a sit down with your body? Guys name their penises sometimes so perhaps talking to it is not much of a stretch. As long as he doesn't think it talks back it should be alright. ;p