Today, I came home to find a BMW partially blocking my driveway. I was already having a bad day, and was upset that some stuck up fool blocked my driveway, so I keyed the driver's side. 5 minutes later my parents show up. The BMW was a graduation gift for me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I came home to find a car parked in my assigned space. Pissed off, I left a note on the car's windshield saying, "Hey Assface, thanks for parking in my spot. I spat on your door handle." It turns out it was my girlfriend's parent's car. They took us out to dinner. FML
Today, I went on a date with a girl that I really like. I picked her up from her house, and as I was pulling out of her driveway, I hit her dad's BMW, knocking off the bumper. FML
Today, I came home to find my dad had backed into my already crappy car. The reason they didn't buy me a nicer car in the first place was they were afraid I'd wreck it. FML
Today, I went to pick my daughter up from school, only to find that a contractor had parked his car across my driveway. After squeezing my car out, I went to drive out of my street, only to find it had been blocked off. I drove in the other direction to find that a bulldozer was blocking the other end. FML
Today, and for all my life, my dad has been feral about protecting his BMW; we weren’t even allowed to look at it. Well today he decided I was allowed to drive it as an 18th birthday present. I was so nervous, I hyperventilated and passed out in the seat before I even put the key in the ignition. FML
Today, I borrowed my mom’s BMW to impress my new girlfriend. I'd told her that I owned an accounting firm, so I had to look the part. Today was also the day someone decided to rear-end us. That someone happened to be my boss at Burger King. Let’s just say, the cat’s out of the bag and I’m single now. FML
Today, I saw a sketchy looking person frustratingly trying to open a BMW in the parking lot where I work. I ran outside to confront him and call the cops. Turns out, not only was he the owner of that vehicle, but he was one of our company’s biggest donors. FML
Today, I was trying to do a nice thing and let my friend's mom borrow my car. I went to move my mom's car that was parked behind me so that I could get my car out, and then proceeded to back into my dad's new company car. FML
Today, during a driving lesson, I accidentally rear-ended a BMW at a traffic light. The number plate was "Law Man." FML
Today, I woke up to find the entire driver's side of my car wrecked. Front door, back door, front and rear bumper smashed to shit. A drunk driver had hit it the previous night and ran. Don't worry though, he stopped and left his insurance information. He keyed it into the undamaged side of my car. FML
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Top comments
NGM_47 0
WOW!! you're stupid...even if it wasn't yours, you shouldn't have done that, you're just rude!! YDI x 100!!
xlol_fml 0
What an overreaction o_O
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Comments (383)
Billie_Joe21 0
how would you like it if someone did that to you? oh wait, you did do it to you! see how it feels?
QuentinM95 0
and im just expected to graduate college, what in the name of God is a graduation gift?
Bloodrush 0
YDI for being a complete douchebag, you would key someone's car because you had a bad day you little pansy ****...and you cant park on the street because why youre too good or some shit...
errorxkat 1
YDI for disrespecting a BMW. And disrespecting the person you thought owned the BMW.
eli_guerra 0
I am just pointing out if everybody controlled their tempers, this website would lose a lot of FML stories.
dreamofme 0
Dude. This is so fake. I've heard this joke before. ... back in like the 8th grade. I don't understand how so many stupid FMLs get chosen for this site when it's obvious that there are a ton of submissions. Ugh.
CyclonePsycho 1
What would you have done if it WASN'T your car, and the real owner happened to be a relative/your boss/an MMA fighter? Lesson Learned: Don't **** with other people's shit no matter the reason.
Vitamin_C 0
You are such a twatty, ******* little bitch, OP. Serious hate-on for you in these comments and you deserve it all. It's true what they say - only arrogant, self-absorbed pricks drive Beemers.
Grimm3r 0
I feel bad for you. I wish that that wasn't your BMW. I wish it was another guy's, and he seen you keying his car, and he broke your jaw. You're such a spoiled PoS its amazing, and you seem ignorant to the fact that you're not king shit, and that people really aren't going to sympathize with a rich brat like yourself. Your personality sounds obnoxious and like the above poster said you DEFINITELY deserve all of this. What the hell is going through your mind when you post this? Do you really think that your life's rough? You make me sick.
crazykilla 0
lmmfao ydi for being a rich lil punk who can control his own anger and tries to take it out on someones else but in fact took it out on your own f*ckin car lmao
ShadowPoseidon 0
omg... your a ******* dumb ass... ydi