Today, I came home to find a BMW partially blocking my driveway. I was already having a bad day, and was upset that some stuck up fool blocked my driveway, so I keyed the driver's side. 5 minutes later my parents show up. The BMW was a graduation gift for me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I came home to find a car parked in my assigned space. Pissed off, I left a note on the car's windshield saying, "Hey Assface, thanks for parking in my spot. I spat on your door handle." It turns out it was my girlfriend's parent's car. They took us out to dinner. FML
Today, I went on a date with a girl that I really like. I picked her up from her house, and as I was pulling out of her driveway, I hit her dad's BMW, knocking off the bumper. FML
Today, I came home to find my dad had backed into my already crappy car. The reason they didn't buy me a nicer car in the first place was they were afraid I'd wreck it. FML
Today, I went to pick my daughter up from school, only to find that a contractor had parked his car across my driveway. After squeezing my car out, I went to drive out of my street, only to find it had been blocked off. I drove in the other direction to find that a bulldozer was blocking the other end. FML
Today, and for all my life, my dad has been feral about protecting his BMW; we weren’t even allowed to look at it. Well today he decided I was allowed to drive it as an 18th birthday present. I was so nervous, I hyperventilated and passed out in the seat before I even put the key in the ignition. FML
Today, I borrowed my mom’s BMW to impress my new girlfriend. I'd told her that I owned an accounting firm, so I had to look the part. Today was also the day someone decided to rear-end us. That someone happened to be my boss at Burger King. Let’s just say, the cat’s out of the bag and I’m single now. FML
Today, I saw a sketchy looking person frustratingly trying to open a BMW in the parking lot where I work. I ran outside to confront him and call the cops. Turns out, not only was he the owner of that vehicle, but he was one of our company’s biggest donors. FML
Today, I was trying to do a nice thing and let my friend's mom borrow my car. I went to move my mom's car that was parked behind me so that I could get my car out, and then proceeded to back into my dad's new company car. FML
Today, during a driving lesson, I accidentally rear-ended a BMW at a traffic light. The number plate was "Law Man." FML
Today, I woke up to find the entire driver's side of my car wrecked. Front door, back door, front and rear bumper smashed to shit. A drunk driver had hit it the previous night and ran. Don't worry though, he stopped and left his insurance information. He keyed it into the undamaged side of my car. FML
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Top comments
NGM_47 0
WOW!! you're stupid...even if it wasn't yours, you shouldn't have done that, you're just rude!! YDI x 100!!
xlol_fml 0
What an overreaction o_O
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Comments (383)
RigChan 0
That was really immature of you.
White_Turk70 0
wow, your life sucks. a BMW for graduation. man, your life really is ******.
tonix_fml 0
well that was deserved. even if that didn't turn out to be your car, how dare you key it just to make a stupid little point. you realize there are poor people in the world who would give up one of their organs to have your life. spoiled brat.
mikew85 0
That sucks, and I almost said YDI, bit your parents are morons for blocking the driveway with it. awesome grad gift though!!!
Ilovestupidpeopl 0
Keying cars is complete chicken shit for people that don't have the stones to actually confront people. You ******* deserved it, asshat.
morgan020 0
use car chalk don't key it. if nothing else most of the time it waxes right out. and yeah you are a brat. I've only gotten revenge on a jackass one time when I was pregnant and he hit my car with his door that I had bought for myself in highschool and worked really hard to keep it looking nice too bad he didn't have the same consideration for his truck...I beat the side of his truck with the door on my car that he had hit :) don't mess with pregnant women but yeah I still say YDI if it's in front of your house it's prolly there for a reason.
graciegirl 0
sorry, but whenever i hear something like that, i think it's so ignorant. you can't judge someone by their parents' tax bracket. i hope your bitterness subsides
Ibeapirate 0
The lesson here is: Never, ever key a car, no matter how pissy you are. No good will ever come of it. I promise.
chea_chea 0
I don't see the FML here. You got a BMW, so you keyed it, that's your fault, either way you goy a ******* BMW. That doesn't happen to many people, I got seventy dollars for graduating HS and am driving a 10 year old camry with 140,000 miles on it. My parents can't even afford a new car for themselves, nevermind me...so stop complaining about your oh so miserable life.
manga_fml 15
ummm so you keyed the car of your parents guests?? so you thought? stupid movie. it's your driveway they are your guests