Today, I bought the only cat on Earth that doesn't like chasing after a laser dot. Goodbye, hours of sick, sick entertainment. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought it would be a good idea to surprise my cat with a fancy new toy. I spent $30 on a laser pointer. Turns out, my cat is terrified of lasers, and spent the next hour giving me the "You betrayed me" look from under the couch. FML
Today, my cat woke me up, but not by kneading on me though. Instead, she woke me up by pouncing on the laser pointer my dad was shining on my face. FML
Today, one of my friends was playing with a laser pointer. When he pointed it in my direction, I swatted at it away like it was a bug. Apparently, I'm part cat. FML
Today, I adopted a cat, thinking it would make my life a little less lonely. Within an hour, the cat ran away. Not even animals want to be around me. FML
Today, I learned that as adorable as it might be to watch your cat follow your cursor around the screen, the humor ends when she dives into and breaks the monitor. FML
Today, my friend finally convinced me that if I picked up her cat it wouldn't scratch my eyes out. It peed on me instead. FML
Today, I walked outside to see my dog killing my cat. My spouse tried to cheer me up - "Hey, at least we don't have to buy cat food anymore!" FML
Today, I bought a kitten. I've wanted a cat for years and decided to finally buy one now that I have my own apartment. It turns out I'm allergic to cats. FML
Today, I saw my cat playing with one of his many toy mice. Knowing he likes to play fetch, I picked it up and threw it across the room. Upon trying to pick it up a second time, I realized that not only was it not a toy, but it was only half-dead. FML
Today, I was woken up from a nap by my cat attacking my face. Evidently, my husband thought it would be funny to shine a laser pointer on my cheek. FML
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Top comments
Warden1986 16
Maybe you should give it catnip first, then try the laser pointer...
poppysoda 4
Us cats are not all easily amused.
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Comments (201)
iKristien 5
So you just bought a cat to let it chase red laser dots for your own entertainment. So you could probably post some stupid video's and pictures on the internet of how your cat chases 'the red dot'. Wow.
inapickle101 6
I have a cat who just sits behind the tv and wont play with any toy or laser pointers. I also have a dog who hates fetch and tug-a-war. -_-
avifors 10
My cat watches it slightly interested but she doesnt go after it
kitten1323 19
Holy shit, people need to calm down. He bought a cat and tried the laser pointer thing. The cat didn't chase it so he made a joke. A JOKE people. Does the fml say "Today I bought a cat so I could use it for entertainment."? No. It doesn't. So calm the **** down. Everyone here who is going all ASPCA on everyone is extremely stupid and can't take a joke whatsoever. It's annoying and rude. Get off your damn high horse.
SanaSazi 32
I've got a Chinese crested hairless that loves the laser pointer to the point of obsession. Even if I open the draw where I keep it she'll come running like her life depends on it.
tehman117 21
OH MY GOD IT WON'T RUN AROUND LIKE AN IDIOT. YOU POOR THING!!!!!!!
Quadroblitz 10
Cats only do that until they get older. My aunt has cats that are almost as old as me who never chase laser dots.
sayroshi 15
I've got a dog you would love, then. She will literally try to climb walls to get any sort of light. Even a flashlight beam.
NLloyd14 2
I have a cat like that too. She is super fat too.
Soulless_95 20
None of my cats chase lasers, and I have 6.