Today, I began to daydream about going on a diet and losing some weight. As I did so, I unknowingly reached for a giant bag of chips and ate the whole thing. Now, I have stopped daydreaming and am sitting alone and depressed. And I'm all out of chips. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I had a dream in which I was eating vast quantities of pizza, cookies, and pastries. I became so anxious about all the calories that I woke up. Even in my dreams I'm self conscious about my diet. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my diet coach. I was telling her how I lost 3 pounds this week. I was saying this while eating a bag of chips, a beer in my hand and cooking a 3-meat pizza. FML
Today, I stopped at a mini-mart and bought a family-size bag of potato chips, a tub of dip, a box of toaster pastries, and some snack cakes. The guy at the counter said, "Wow, someone's hungry!" I told him it wasn't all for me, paid, and left in a huff. It was all for me. I ate it all by that evening. FML
Today, I was online looking up ways to lose weight, get thinner and be healthier, all the while eating a slab of brownie that was half the size of my head. FML
Today, I accidentally poured milk into my bowl of chips. FML
Today, after I completely starved myself for a week and exercised every day in an attempt to lose weight, I instead gained 5 pounds. FML
Today, I sat down on my couch with a nice cool beer after a tough day at work. I tried opening a bag of chips. The bag exploded, covering me in chips and crumbs, turning me into a sticky human nacho. Well, my dog certainly saw me as a snack, and I had to shower and change clothes. So much for relaxing. FML
Today, I was watching this show about fat people. I was wondering how people could let this happen to themselves. Then I looked down and saw a giant bowl of popcorn, ice cream, potato chips, and soda. I thus figured out how people do this to themselves. FML
Today, I'm so out of shape that my arm ached after lifting chips out of a Lays bag. FML
Today, I realized that my diet has gone completely bust. If I try to limit the amount of food that I eat, my stomach is growling and keeping me up at night, when my sugar isn't crashing and turning me into a food vacuum cleaner eating everything in sight. I'm not starving myself, I'm trying to control my portions. FML
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Top comments
music_woman1 11
Join a gym? Or possibly a bootcamp, because you need the willpower and perseverance
somewizdom 15
You should daydream more often, but with a salad next to you.
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Comments (62)
BubbleGrunge 18
I'm just curious how you managed to daydream so long that you were able to eat a whole bag of chips? You must have a vivid imagination! Next time grab a pen and paper to write or draw when you daydream!
FlyingPie 17
How do you reach for something and eat it unknowingly? The only thing I can think of is sleepwalking, perhaps?
lively12 0
It happens to the best of us! I've had the same daydream over n over again
jennifernorvell 7
How do you not know you Are eating?
Calyx_fml 22
Quack.
Redraconteur 4
I said this on a recent FML, but starting is the hardest part, OP. Once you get yourself into an exercise routine and begin to see the results you'll become even more motivated to push yourself harder. I ran my first ever triathlon yesterday. I feel so strong and empowered. It's inspired me to work out even more towards gaining my ideal body because I'm so close I can taste it. Two years ago if you asked me if I would ever run a triathlon I would have laughed at you and gone back to eating pizza.
Anita1023632 3
Do P90X! Even though its pretty hard, if you press play every day, you will have your dream body!
zuzupetalsYO 11
Why do people make themselves suffer over losing weight? You can't think it away. It's called EXERCISE.
phoenixx3 3
Try roasted garlic hummus and veggies instead of junk food for snacks an hour of physical activity a day atleast can do wonders. It's also proven when you get physically active it releases feel good endorphins that will help with that depressed feeling !!!!!
MaryPoppins88 14
This is stupid don't buy chips then , join a gym, make a lifestyle change.
colts1844 0
How long were u daydreaming for? And what kind of chips? If they weren't ruffles ydi