Today, I ate an entire pack of breath mints in preparation for a date. Instead of giving me fresh breath, it gave me a terrible case of diarrhea. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I discovered that the wintergreen breath mints I've been taking for a week now, are actually circular, flavored, white and green laxatives. FML
Today, I decided to pick up some breath mints. As I was checking out, the cashier informed me that if I was "planning on getting a girl to stay the night", I'd need the "stronger, more intense brand of mints". FML
Hyper self-awareness
Today, I was on a first date and everything was going great, until I realized I had garlic breath from the garlic bread I ate earlier. I tried covering it with a mouthful of wine, but it just made it worse. I ended up trying to avoid any closeness, and now I guess I'll just die alone. FML
You've got something…
Today, I rushed out of the bathroom with toothpaste smeared all over my chin and cheek. I was so anxious about going on a date that I didn’t realize this until said date pointed it out halfway through dinner. FML
Just in case
Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling in bed talking about our future wedding coming up. He leaned over seductively to tell me he got a present for me to ‘use’ on our wedding day. It was a pack of breath mints. FML
Classy
Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML
Dilemma
Today, I have chronic dry mouth due to medication. It makes my breath smell atrocious, so I got some Biotene dry mouth lozenges. I usually have constipation issues. Lately it's been the opposite. So I can either have porta-potty breath or be on the brink of shitting myself. FML
Take a load off
Today, a long day of work and a bad day for my mental health, I tried to relax with my wife, a movie, and a soda. After returning from using the bathroom, I took a swig to discover a particularly odorous stink bug had snuck into the can, now my mouth. FML
The Sweet Smell of Success
Today, I was out on my first date in months. My stomach didn’t feel quite right after dinner, but I tried to ignore it. During the movie, it got so bad I decided to try to sneak a small fart for relief. As soon as I did, the theater fell dead silent. My fart practically echoed in the silence. FML
Today, I almost died. How? I nearly suffocated after passing out while chewing an entire pack of gum. I should really drink less. FML
Top comments
DalPozzo13 10
Shit happens
bbgirlXD 6
Well next time brush your teethes , instead of just covering your bad breath .
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Comments (189)
UrAverageBrat 10
Do you even know what sugar alcohol is??
EpicLovee 2
You really needed to eat the WHOLE pack? Your breath smells THAT bad? ....
darkmis1 18
Did you ever consider brushing your teeth instead?
hiscrazygurl1 5
I bet it was minty fresh coming out :)
linkinpark98 24
*Chuckles* That was stupid of you OP.
caviar_fml 2
why didn't you just brush your teeth?!
doubleohseven 0
Dumbass
jamaicanbunny 0
It's called brushing your teeth. How bad does your breath smell that you had to eat a whole pack..
stompic 2
don't understand why there are so many YDIs. It's not your fault if you are... okay, i shut up.....
GypsyRover 0
One girl and her cup!
thatsmylyfe 13
GAG!! that video was NASTY!!