Today, I decided to pick up some breath mints. As I was checking out, the cashier informed me that if I was "planning on getting a girl to stay the night", I'd need the "stronger, more intense brand of mints". FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I ate an entire pack of breath mints in preparation for a date. Instead of giving me fresh breath, it gave me a terrible case of diarrhea. FML
Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling in bed talking about our future wedding coming up. He leaned over seductively to tell me he got a present for me to ‘use’ on our wedding day. It was a pack of breath mints. FML
Today, I discovered that the wintergreen breath mints I've been taking for a week now, are actually circular, flavored, white and green laxatives. FML
Today, I was in a crowded elevator and tried to discreetly take a breath mint. The little tin slipped from my hands, bounced off my shoe, and scattered mints everywhere. Everyone stared as I bent over, frantically picking them up, muttering, “I swear I’m usually cool.” FML
Today, I caught my mother trying to switch my contraceptive pill for Tic Tacs. I don't know what's worse - how far she will go to have a grandchild, or that she thought I wouldn't notice that my birth control left me with minty fresh breath. FML
Today, my girlfriend got pissed when I told her she needed to brush her teeth more than once a day. I could smell her breath from across the bed. FML
Today, I learned how much it hurts to put a mint up your nose. FML
Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML
Today, I went to the store to pick up some feminine products. As I was paying, the male cashier looked at me sympathetically and asked if it was my girlfriend's time of the month. I'm a girl and was buying them for myself. FML
Today, I went to the store with my girlfriend. She needed to use the bathroom so I started looking at the books. It wasn't until the manager shot me a weird look that I realized I'd wandered down too far and was looking at bridal magazines, holding tampons, dog treats, and hair spray. FML
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Top comments
saxaddict122 14
Unless you managed to pick the wrong gender for your profile, why would the cashier assume you are a lesbian?
Sir_ND_Pity 35
I see that the cashier was trying to get fresh with you. I'm sure they didn't mint what they said, so just take a big breath and ignore them, OP! Or, you know, brush your teeth / tongue, a bit more :P hygiene is sexy ;)
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Comments (41)
tin_cup 27
Gotta love honesty!
extrasnipes 22
Would you prefer had he said nothing of your bad breath?
deathrise007 22
The cashier shouldn't have said that so bluntly. FYL
Sir_ND_Pity 35
I see that the cashier was trying to get fresh with you. I'm sure they didn't mint what they said, so just take a big breath and ignore them, OP! Or, you know, brush your teeth / tongue, a bit more :P hygiene is sexy ;)
saxaddict122 14
Unless you managed to pick the wrong gender for your profile, why would the cashier assume you are a lesbian?
midnightm16 24
That's what I was thinking
gracehi 33
Perhaps the cashier knows OP personally? Or maybe OP is a regular customer and thus the two have become somewhat familiar with one another. Either of those situations might also explain why the cashier felt at liberty to be so sassy with a customer.
RageWolf16 31
My guess was that the cashier was into women and was speaking from experience, or that the world is finally leaving heteronormativity behind
Khaleesi_26 30
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Kendall is considered a unisex name. So OP could be a male. :)
JesusFreak227 15
That's not what's being discussed....
vikky538 29
My thoughts exactly
nodeathtoall 19
@16 the gender identifier for the post says female
Khaleesi_26 30
On my app it doesn't have the OP's gender. Just the username.
rivaraven 35
Yeaah, I really wish the app would show gender and location once again. Even if not in situation like this, we are missing a lot of info.
MikaykayUnicorn 36
OP could have been dressed as what people look at as the stereotypical lesbian. Or OP could have been wearing a shirt that says "I LIKE ******."
InfiniteSunshine 32
I'm surprised a cashier would even say something so incredibly rude like that. I wouldn't even try for fear the customer would complain to the manager and I would get fired. Although, maybe they just don't care, or worse, maybe they are the manager.
hardcorefan16 22
At least they were honest.
interesting33 37
Honesty is no excuse for being rude.
EnJey0 19
If your breath smelled that bad that a cashier could smell it 1-2 feet away, there's a problem
MikaykayUnicorn 36
Some people breathe really hard which presses the scent of your breath towards them. I babysat a kid who was a mouth breather and you could smell his breath from 2 feet away. It wasn't necessarily bad, but you could smell it.
BiGTiMeNeRD 29
We'll never know what she really mint.
tech1200mk5 6
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Who the f--- does she think she is?! Rude B----can keep her $7/hr job with a nosy attitude like that.
gracehi 33
You're allowed to write the word "****" here at "**** My Life." Just FYI.
XxDanno316xX 27
Calm down. :)