Today, I asked my fiancé what he liked most about being in a relationship with me. His answer? "I can watch your boobs without being called a perv." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend told me that the only reason he likes me is because I let him watch porn without throwing a fuss. FML
Today, I realized the nicest thing my fiancé has said to me all month was that I have "very suckable titties." FML
Today, while having sex, my boyfriend admitted to having an affair. To comfort me, he said, "But you have bigger boobs, so you have nothing to worry about." FML
Today, I noticed that I've been gaining some weight. Don't worry, my boyfriend doesn't mind. His new favorite thing is putting my boobs on his head and saying he feels "safe". FML
Today, I was hooking up with a guy for the first time and he told me I was in luck. When I asked why he replied, "I like little boobs." FML
Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML
Today, feeling romantic and overwhelmed with love, I told my fiancée: "I don't know what I'd do without you." She replied: "Well, you'd wank". FML
Today, my boyfriend told me he loved me. I asked why, and he said, "Because sometimes you look good, and you buy me stuff." FML
Today, I was laying in bed with my boyfriend. He started caressing me, his eyes were closed, and he said, “I love touching your boobs.” Which was actually a roll of fat on my stomach. FML
Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in a really really romantic way. After we called our parents to tell them the news, he turned to me and said, "Hey, I hope you know this doesn't mean you can start getting lazy with your blowjobs." FML
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Top comments
dibbledipps 0
A good girlfriend would be flattered.
Hgielad_720 0
Wow haha. That was an epic answer. ;) I'm proud of him.
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Comments (165)
dibbledipps 0
A good girlfriend would be flattered.
Chaith 16
Maybe not? Anyone else notice in Japan, where this FML is from, boobs are put on a pedestal? #1 Country to have big boobs in the world. Fo really.
thesunsetglow_fml 8
#24 I noticed that too, Japan is like the horniest country in the world (I base this off of those scary sexual cartoons and their National Sex Day and the sex-vending machines.) So to the OP, YDI for thinking he wanted anything different while living in Japan. ;)
ilovemydoodle123 0
I know this might sound stupid, but what does ftw mean?
Specterk50 0
ftw=for the win
THEMANN1000 0
for the win dumbass
Fortuitous 0
You are all imbeciles. It's "**** the world", bitches.
wowthatshorrible_fml 0
it's both
DarkHelmet 10
wait wait wait WAIT!!!!! they have a National Sex Day AND Sex Vending Machines in Japan!!!!! I'm ****** moving!!!!!!!
jewban 3
no it actually means **** the what
_TONGAN_ 5
FTW means Falling Through Windows!! lol IDK
ERICA833 0
jewban: that's what I thought too!!
R2d6 0
lol @72
citruslime 0
:D exactly
omgwork 0
are you black?
FLCL4711Fox 0
48 you son of a mother ****** **** suckin bastard! you're just going around posting this you weak minded fool! nobody answer this anymore! this guy is a phony! a big fat phony! isn't that right you fat phony?!
stephanie0613 0
Hey atleast he likes something about being in a relationship with you and is planning on marrying you! you should be happy.
Dragons_corner 6
I agree with 72 I'm moving.
phreshboi 1
why would you ask that when he's your fiance? that's a question that should be asked way before he's your fiance...
cycle227 3
and of course, WTF means "why the face", right?
humzizzl3 0
72 you horny little boy
okieraider71 4
Women NEVER UNDERSTAND the power boobs have over men.
BlackMoon_fml 9
#72, ditto!!
awzmness 0
for the win
afroninjashuffle 0
japan is the number one most perveted country in the world! ftw
_TONGAN_ 5
133- he's not a little boy you dick shit!
silverstream20 20
137 I actually could not agree with you more, Boob power is insane
lifesucks1234567_fml 2
well now you fiancé is a perv
xxEternalRain 13
Yeah if she was a ****
yourWIFEandKIDS 0
lol
MrDanimal 0
Hey retard, if you were older then 12 you would actually like boobs. Assuming you are straight. Which I think you are not with that comment. This is the exact reason to have a girlfriend. To sum up. You=Gay, Boobs=Awesome.
taytay6510 6
hey dumbass, how can you presume someones gay from them saying lol... you = dumbfuck , this comment = awesome
eddieyes 0
#2=#4=fat ass
Mehness 0
4 - What the **** are you ranting on about? All 2 said was "lol."
xlovexsexxmagic 0
it doesn't say "lol"
sourgirl101 29
My #2 says 'dump him' not 'lol'???
Hgielad_720 0
It originally said lol but now it says something else.
TaylorTotsYumm 10
Sourgirl, if your poo spells out words, you may have a problem. Heh heh.
sourgirl101 29
My #2 dump? haha, you are clever!(:
TaylorTotsYumm 10
It took me 4 tries to get that comment to post. I had to say it.(:
GaryBusey1121 0
if you poo spells out words you are magical, and you belong in the upmost of places high on a pedestal so others can bow at your pleasure.
KingDingALing 9
This conversation went from talking about gayness, to a conversation about poop. How the **** does that happen?
theFMLiest1ofThe 0
it's UTmost, Gary. I realize you've got the same number of brain cells left, as that guy Pedro on the Real World (season 2 i think) had T-cells left...but try to sound like you interact w people smarter than your imaginary friend once in a while. God, I'm going to hell. we miss you Pedro. rip
GaryBusey1121 0
I think your boyfriend left some fecal matter on your chin.
I_like_chicken 0
3 things 1. #2 u stole my pic 2. #25 that's GREAT 3. gary ur pic scares the heck out of me, change it
GaryBusey1121 0
better?
I_like_chicken 0
waaay better
taytay6510 6
WTF no, u scare me :O
mintcar 10
Haha, how sweet.
Hgielad_720 0
Wow haha. That was an epic answer. ;) I'm proud of him.
Zmeilerr 22
you're awesome :D
Hgielad_720 0
Duh :)
skittle68 0
I agree- this is hilarious
WallyTheWombat 0
That's one of the perks of being in a relationship. OP should be flattered that he's lookin at her chest and not someone else's.
hedgerow 0
I'd call it a fringe benefit.
nakidna 0
have a sense of humor. he's most likely joking.
GaryBusey1121 0
Every man loves to stare at Chesticles. it does not matter, if the lady is 100 yrs old we will still look at her ****.
FMLephant 2
even if they're sagging to the floor
Lucidium 0
Riiiiiight.
lmtlmt 7
ew wtf dude, I aint lookin at no 100 year old ****!
lookahtmeh 0
nasty
Muffinzz11 7
lol those things would be dust
macgruberiscool 0
your boyfriend is epicly full of win
boopityboppity 11
*Cringes* You just "epicly" failed.
mattyboonie 0
cringes. shush it's funny
garrett_T 0
well, you asked him.
jaaaz 3
haha, nice answer ;)