Today, I asked a guy out. He told me no. Well, his exact words were, "I would never go out with a whale, sorry." Then he went on to make whale noises. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was at my senior dance dancing with this guy I really like. He was telling me how he likes a strong woman who's not afraid to make the first move. Empowered by what he said, I asked him out. He said no because he thinks girls shouldn't ask guys out. FML
Today, I asked out the girl I really like. She turned me down, saying that she's a lesbian. That'd be fine, if I were a guy. FML
Today, I finally got the courage to make a move on the guy I've been crushing on. I asked him if he would like to go see a movie with me. He answered, "Sorry, I've already seen it." I didn't even mention any particular movie. FML
Today, I asked the guy I like if he wanted to go to lunch tomorrow at a local restaurant. He replied that he doesn't like their food. I think that's a no. FML
Today, while out for lunch, a guy approached me and asked for my number. I politely declined. To my dismay, he dropped to his knees, grabbed his head, and started moaning about how nobody ever gives him a chance. I felt the accusing stares. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she was worried about being eaten by a whale while out kayaking on our holiday tour. I told her that she was way larger than whale food, and that it wouldn’t be interested in her. Now she is accusing me of trying to tell her "nicely" that she's fat. FML
Today, I was on a date with this guy I just met and we went to a fancy restaurant. Halfway through the meal, there was an awkward silence, and he decided to end it by saying "You know, you chew like a cow." FML
Today, I saw the guy I have a crush on kissing a blonde chick. He'd turned me down because he “wasn’t into blondes”. I’m a blonde myself. When I confronted him about it, he told me, “Oh, I should have been more specific. I’m not into blondes who have a face like Sid the Sloth and a body like Shamu.” FML
Today, I was texting the guy I like. I asked him why our friend didn't want to come to the movies with us. He replied, "She didn't want to be the third wheel, but it's not like I'm going to put the moves on you. I'm out of your league, and you're socially awkward anyway." That's just what I wanted. FML
Today, I asked the man of my dreams out on a date. His response: "I'd rather eat my own balls." FML
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Top comments
olpally 33
Slap him for being rude. Geeze, that's cold.
okokalright 15
You will find someone eventually. Unfortunately, people can be ******* assholes that are probably insecure themselves.
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Comments (181)
LuvelyGirl 9
What a pig, oink oink. Sorry to hear that OP
Tannasgh 22
Inconsiderate jerk. All women have something beautiful, most men are just to lazy to look.
Treaton 5
this is funny cause girls should feel the rejection we guys have to deal with all the time. Women can be alot more mean than this guy making whale noises.
mexicano101 4
Wow what a dick
Amke 3
All these comments saying to hurt him... wtf is wrong with you ppl, you dont assault ppl cuz they called you a name. How is that ever ok? Take it like a ******* adult.
conman531 23
What an asshole. If he is even your friend drop him. don't need that negativity around you
classicsparkles 17
Unnecessarily rude. Honestly would not expect behavior like that from anyone over the age of 5. I wouldn't take anything someone with that maturity level has to say with more than a grain of salt, so don't let that affect your confidence level, which I find admirable. Many girls (myself included) don't have the courage to make the first move.
FedoraGuy 15
I really hope you kicked him in the balls after that.
giraffeegreen 7
Don't let a jerk like that get you down. He deserves a cold hearted person like himself.
KaylaTackett 18
wow that is so rude! **** that guy!