Today, I admitted to my wife that I'd really like to get a Prius, but I was worried that if I did, everyone would question my sexuality. She told me, "I don't know why you care, everyone already thinks you're gay." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was telling my dad about how I emasculated my guy friends because I can drive a stick shift while they can't. He said, "And you wonder why people think you're a lesbian." FML
Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML
Today, I told my friends I had been hiding something that I wanted to come clean on. My one friend responds by saying, "FINALLY you come out of the closet. It's about time." I'm not gay. I was just going to tell them my parents were getting a divorce. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend I wanted to tell her something important. Coincidentally, she did too. She wanted to tell me that she thinks she's actually gay. I wanted to tell her I love her. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. My mother turned to me and said, "Wait you're actually gay? I thought you were just saying that to piss off your father." I came out to her when I was 16, and have confided in her about my past relationships. FML
Today, my wife and I went shopping for new glasses at a local store, but we didn't really get to actually buying one. On our way back, she warned me that my glasses of choice should in no way be 'those big arty ones'. When I asked her why not, she told me that I 'look gay enough already'. FML
Today, I unintentionally came out as bi to my boss. He said he's fine with it and doesn't care either way, only that there is too much "gay propaganda" in the world and it shouldn't be shown and talked about so much. He also doesn't understand why I was reluctant to talk about my sexuality before. FML
Today, I asked out a coworker I really like. She gave me a weird look and said, "You're not gay?" I said no, to which she said, "Well, I am". As it turns out, I was the only one who thought she was straight, and the only one who thought I was straight. FML
Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML
Today, I found out that my crush is a lesbian. Everyone knew about it. Everyone also knew that I liked her. No one told me. FML
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Top comments
I_EAT_KITTENS_FO 5
tell her "well, I guess if I'm gay, we can't have sex anymore"
StopDropNRoll 11
Looks like a new car it is ^^
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Comments (86)
FlyingWhisps 5
A Prius? That's not a vehicle, that's a lunchbox.
krysxkatastrophe 14
I didn't know cars come with sexual orientations. Guess they really do make everything nowadays.
FaraPjJammaz 13
How does driving a prius make you gay? It's a statement that you're smart about gas and money!
MsCane 6
Why do you care what people think?! Get that Prius and tell people to kiss your ass! Well, that's what I would do. P.S. I actually laughed out loud when I read this.
daftPunKt 4
Does Larry David look gay to you?? Get it!!
Ray_of_midnight 23
Haters gonna hate. They're just jealous because they have to fill their oh-so-macho Canyonero SUVs with gas at $100 a tankful. Laugh at them while you're passing the gas station.
cosmosis 12
Yep, because that will solve all his problems.... Genius ...
ncvaboy123 3
Coming from a guy who drives a big diesel truck, you sir, are incredibly gay!
graham11 14
At least OP is environmentally conscious unlike you who are driving a gas guzzler! Karma is a bitch.
THE_A_TEEN 28
What the **** is a twat-tant??
ncvaboy123 3
Actually it would be fuel. I don't put gas in my truck and my "gas guzzler" averages 25 mpg.......
ncvaboy123 3
and about being environmentally conscious. Your carbon foot print by using electricity to charge your matchbox of a car is much larger than mine for driving a truck. You can hate on a large truck but diesels are more Eco friendly than any gas car.
ncvaboy123 3
Yeah that's what the manufacturer told you. If you had an ounce of sense you would know that diesel exhaust is much cleaner than gas and far better than all the electricity your using to charge it.
cheeseboy77 0
the electricity in B.C. Canada where I live, is mostly hydroelectric that means it barely hurt the environment at all for electricity. thus proving the prius is much better than your gas guzzler.
americanafrican 32
let them hear you hurt the environment! prius sucks ****
raphanne_fml 33
Saving on gas and caring about environmental issues makes you gay? Wow, then I would love to hear their definition of heterosexuals...
graham11 14
Heterosexuals are NOT environmentally friendly! Occupy heterosexuals!
raphanne_fml 33
Hmm, I'm straight and I care about environment :D
graham11 14
94- I'm straight and I'm such a tree hugger:) I was just bein sarcastic
raphanne_fml 33
Shame on me, my sarcasm detector was off! I shall occupy my bed and get off of the internet!
graham11 14
145- okay goodnight
EnterSandman_fml 20
The Prius is such a lame green statement anyway. All those minerals that they have to mine for the battery certainly aren't helping the environment any. If the Honda FCX Clarity is available in your area, it's much greener.