Today, I admitted to my wife that I'd really like to get a Prius, but I was worried that if I did, everyone would question my sexuality. She told me, "I don't know why you care, everyone already thinks you're gay." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was telling my dad about how I emasculated my guy friends because I can drive a stick shift while they can't. He said, "And you wonder why people think you're a lesbian." FML
Today, at 18, I finally told my mom I was gay. She spent the rest of the day bringing up my "future wife" at every possible chance she had. FML
Today, I told my friends I had been hiding something that I wanted to come clean on. My one friend responds by saying, "FINALLY you come out of the closet. It's about time." I'm not gay. I was just going to tell them my parents were getting a divorce. FML
Today, I told my girlfriend I wanted to tell her something important. Coincidentally, she did too. She wanted to tell me that she thinks she's actually gay. I wanted to tell her I love her. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. My mother turned to me and said, "Wait you're actually gay? I thought you were just saying that to piss off your father." I came out to her when I was 16, and have confided in her about my past relationships. FML
Today, my wife and I went shopping for new glasses at a local store, but we didn't really get to actually buying one. On our way back, she warned me that my glasses of choice should in no way be 'those big arty ones'. When I asked her why not, she told me that I 'look gay enough already'. FML
Today, I unintentionally came out as bi to my boss. He said he's fine with it and doesn't care either way, only that there is too much "gay propaganda" in the world and it shouldn't be shown and talked about so much. He also doesn't understand why I was reluctant to talk about my sexuality before. FML
Today, I asked out a coworker I really like. She gave me a weird look and said, "You're not gay?" I said no, to which she said, "Well, I am". As it turns out, I was the only one who thought she was straight, and the only one who thought I was straight. FML
Today, after weeks of summoning up the courage to come out of the closet to my best friend, I told her I was gay. Immediately after she started cracking up, thinking it was a joke. I was so confused and nervous, I went along with it. She still thinks I'm straight. FML
Today, I found out that my crush is a lesbian. Everyone knew about it. Everyone also knew that I liked her. No one told me. FML
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Top comments
I_EAT_KITTENS_FO 5
tell her "well, I guess if I'm gay, we can't have sex anymore"
StopDropNRoll 11
Looks like a new car it is ^^
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Comments (86)
fatcowmalk 0
Do NOT encourage him to buy a Prius. I forbid it. The Prius is the ugliest piece of shit ever made.
sierrataz 3
You need a new wife.
BlueBug94 4
Haha that sounds like something I'd sat to my boyfriend.
graham11 14
You sit to your boyfriend? That's a new one!
StopDropNRoll 11
But it also gets 50mi/gallon
Confuciussay 6
117 - In the real world, the look of the car is more important than its efficiency.
cmabmb112210 0
I would so take that risk for 50 miles to the gallon
ncvaboy123 3
Tree hugging liberals.
DFlit1 0
No not on the Internet he should have it playing on a loop in his Prius so when people go to call him gay they see him banging his wife and go damn I guess I gotta rethink this insult
stfu_bam 5
You are an idiot. Since when does a car determine someone's sexuality?
builditbetter09 3
Get yourself a gas guzzling 70chevelle ss :D