Today, I was telling my dad about how I emasculated my guy friends because I can drive a stick shift while they can't. He said, "And you wonder why people think you're a lesbian." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my mom tried to convince my dad that I was a lesbian. Why? Because she was bored. FML
Today, my dad has “accepted” that I’m a lesbian, but can’t seem to understand why I can’t just ignore that part of myself, marry a man and have kids, and never talk about the "lesbian thing" ever again. FML
Today, I admitted to my wife that I'd really like to get a Prius, but I was worried that if I did, everyone would question my sexuality. She told me, "I don't know why you care, everyone already thinks you're gay." FML
Today, I found out that my parents have thought I'm lesbian for at least a year. I now understand why my dad has been trying to get me to "hang out" with his co-worker's daughter. FML
Today, I came out of the closet. Now whenever I'm getting ready to go somewhere with my dad he says, "Lesgo, lesbo." FML
Today, I introduced my new boyfriend to my parents. Everyone knows he's into the emo scene, but this didn't stop my dad from slowly looking him up and down, then saying, completely deadpan, "You never told us you were a lesbian, honey." FML
Today, I found out that my mother has been telling everybody that I’m a lesbian, because both of her best friends have at least one gay child each, and she was feeling left out. This explains why people have been treating me differently the last few weeks. FML
Today, one of my dad's work friends came over. As he was leaving, he complimented my dad on having three "strapping young boys." I informed him that I'm a girl, and I have a hormone imbalance that causes me to have a lot of hair and a deep voice. I guess my dress didn't give him a clue. FML
Today, my entire family thinks I'm a lesbian. I'm straight. I'm embarrassed and don't know how to tell them that I've been single for so long because I can't get a guy. FML
Today, I went for a drive with my boyfriend and his dad. His dad was kind enough to point out at every opportunity girls "that would be better for him than me." FML
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Top comments
eftup 9
Women that can drive a stick is a plus. Was that dirty?
lulu121893 0
I didn't know driving a stick would considered being lesbian...?
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Comments (117)
eftup 9
Women that can drive a stick is a plus. Was that dirty?
aussie_gemini 5
is aust most women can! :)
insanesna1l 0
and they drive utes as well
aussie_gemini 5
haha i don't drive a ute... I have a 4WD tho... Somethings gotta tow the boat lol
insanesna1l 0
nice. I have the best of both worlds, a 4x4 ute :-)
aussie_gemini 5
lol well I used to have a panel van and travelled around Australia in it for 8 months... it too was manual.. we rock here dude!
mamaklm 0
not at all. her dad is stupid
yamahajog 0
it's because she emasculated A man that made the lesbian comment make , it's a women emasculating a man which makes her look butch, which makes her look lesbian
MissBunny25 0
what a mean father :/
shannonreneee 11
I am the other Australian who is too lazy to get off her arse and learn manual. Auto is so chilled, hehehe
aussie_gemini 5
oh your from Perth... so your 'laid-back' and meant to be lazy... own it hehe
emodude44 0
Ah Australia. Beautiful women, with (metaphorical) balls the size of grapefruits. Aussie rocks.
aussie_gemini 5
thanks #85 that's pretty much how I'd sum Aussie chicks up too :)
millionaire93 0
haha I thought it was funny, but I'm a car person so I think a woman who can drive a stick is a plus in my book haha
scotty2hottie48 0
Jeep Wrangler Rubicon FTW
persianjr1 7
tell your dad he needs to get a life.
QwertyMcNugget 0
^ Feminist McGee
2010smhill2010 0
this is coming from a guy whose name is QwertyMcnugget
aussie_gemini 5
McWin for McNugget
Cookie4U 0
That would actually be a girl called QwertyMcnugget, a very cute girl at that :D ...... Anyway, I don't see this as an FML, I mean that's actually a decreasing skill. Good job driving stick! (no secxual pun intended)
FlashBurn 13
Driving a stick is nothing special, btw. though, there are things you can do with one that you can't with an automatic. Turn it on and the shift knob becomes a... never mind. Well, that's what I've heard a woman where I work say. O.o
prinzess_fml 25
^ you mean in your family?
5t3ff1k4h 47
7 - Excuse me? My driving school only gives me the option to learn stick shift. I don't get to learn automatic unless my parents teach me. Oh, and I'm far from masculine. Before you comment, yes I started driving school late.
2010smhill2010 0
yes #4 a shift is nonthing but a giant vibrator...man let me tell ou it feels awesome
bennyboy111 7
it's special for americans because they're too shit to drive manual WTF stick shift bahahahahaa
aussie_gemini 5
lol Benny boy I'd have to agree, most chicks can drive a manual here in Australia :)
mrjude 3
This is the dumbest comment on here.
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
I'm an American and I think that everyone who drives here can drive manual, but not as many can drive a stick shift. so it's not because "Americans are too shit" because we can drive both...
Pretty_Pink_Lady 10
oops automatic*
kofinater 3
if you can drive stick, you can sure as hell drive automatic. . .
yamahajog 0
that is wrong on so many levels, what if you sell the car? and how does it look when some girl is sitting in the parking lo of dunken donuts bobbing up and down? O_o I would accept it in some manner but...holy shit if u want to have sex find a guy and leave the poor car alone, what if a fat chick reads this?????
ydi_4_suking 20
I think a few fat chicks already read it
ZachMitch1994 0
dont worry about it its actually not that big of a deal and in the end it will only make you a better driver
ninjafinch624 1
Apparently, not my sister. She could drive my old (stick) Civic just fine, but doesn't know how to use the autobox in my Subaru.
AlecIsTheMan 0
ydi I like your dad he speaks the truth
larfam 2
Especially that in Europe, almost everybody can drive stick, there's nothing special or so difficult about it.
Blue_Barbie 0
......well are you?
that_is_Nathy 9
well, ....so?
mccaincracker 6
I bet there's more reasons than that. ydi since he obviously speaks the truth
prinzess_fml 25
No but she deserves for showing off these kind of "skills" to her guy friends and being proud that they feel shitty about it. Did she want to impress them in order to get more attention/desire?
rosha267 21
yup that's what I was thinking 13
Cenobyte 10
Nothing difficult about driving a car with a manual transmission, just takes a bit of practice. YDI for making your friend feel emasculated about it.
mrjude 3
Maybe she didn't do it on purpose, they just felt that way because she can. It doesn't suggest she was like "LOL YOU GUYS ARE ******* BECAUSE YOU CAN'T DO THIS", it just says she emasculated them. Could just mean that they found out about it and were like "Oh..." and felt bad.
lulu121893 0
I didn't know driving a stick would considered being lesbian...?