Today, at work, I was asked to sharpen some pencils. I'm an electronics and mechanics engineer, and while I understand it's been quite a while since I was in primary school, I still wonder why my boss felt the need to explain in minute detail how to sharpen a pencil. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, having just told me what a great job I've been doing, and how he'd really like to start giving me some more responsibility, my boss asked me if I'd sharpen a couple of pencils for him. FML
Today, at work I noticed that the last of my pencils had been taken from my desk. I assumed it was the coworker who I've talked to at least ten times regarding taking my stationery. I approached her and, feeling brave, yelled at her in front of the entire office. I was holding the pencil. FML
Today, I tried to demonstrate to my friend how laughably dull our kitchen knives are by swiping one across my palm. Turns out Dad noticed the problem yesterday and sharpened them. FML
Today, I was bored at my office, so I started flicking my pencils at my door. My boss walked in right then to give me a raise for my "outstanding" work. She scared me so much when she walked in that I flicked a pencil right at her face. FML
Today, my obsession with replying "Your Mom" reached a new level when my anatomy teacher asked what I'd done with my pencil. FML
Today, I had to explain to my one person on my staff why having kids aged 6 to 9 hammering in screws with the butt end of a screwdriver is neither safe, nor a good idea. FML
Today, I told my boss I need a scrub brush to properly clean the stairs at my workplace. She gave me an old toothbrush. FML
Today, I learned how to sharpen a knife. I sharpened it so well that it went through my finger like a lightsaber. FML
Today, at work, my manager thought I needed to be showed how to use Windex. FML
Today, while babysitting, I got stabbed by a 7 year-old with a mechanical pencil. FML
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Top comments
kellanlvr 1
you stick it in the hole, move it around a bit, then take it out..easy :D
FYLDeep 26
Step 1: Grab the pencil. Step 2: Sharpen the ******* pencil.
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Comments (79)
NightmareStalker 0
atleast you got a job :)
daddy15 0
ydi for having a job
pennies_lane 6
he was just being helpful. maybe you come across as being 'a little bit special' and so he thought you needed some coaching in the tricky act of pencil sharpening
FYLDeep 26
Step 1: Grab the pencil. Step 2: Sharpen the ******* pencil.
bfflrhea 0
lmao
Arch27 27
Step 3: ???? Step 4: Profit
stevenmx86 8
In all seriousness, I'm assuming he's an engineer too and we like our stuff done precisely how we like it. In some cases rather than explain how to do something properly to my wife I prefer to do it because she has trouble with my precise directions.
generalfubar 0
that's corporate America for you
DocBastard 40
No it isn't, jackass. It's corporate UK. Any other rude and baseless comments about America you want to spew at us?
DocBastard 40
Only if you deserve it, KaySL. And so far I'm not detecting any undue cursing or unnecessary lambasting. Strong work, sir.
griffin4 0
that's not even an fml
DocBastard 40
Electronics and mechanical engineer, eh? Methinks OP works the floor at Best Buy.
Keyman1212 14
Ah yes, good possibility, but you must realize, there are only six Best Buy stores in the UK so this guy has a pretty exclusive job!
Penguinman909 7
I live in the UK and haven't seen one Best Buy... Any idea on where these mystical places might be?
mante_fml 0
that has to be frustratin
EvilPrince_fml 0
Why? Simple. Because he's a totalitarian, control freak douchebag like my boss is!