Today, at work at daycare, this kid was coughing really bad, so I put my hand in front of his mouth in case he was choking on something so he could spit it out. But nope he wasn't choking, he was sick. He puked right into my hands. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after feeling sick all day at work, my shift was about to end. Twenty minutes before I was able to clock out, some kid puked all over herself in the playground. FML
Today, I was putting a wristband on a little boy's wrist so he could swim in the waterpark. Just before I finished, he coughed all over my hands and arms. I finished and looked up at the boy just in time for us to make eye contact and for him to cough directly into my face. FML
Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML
Today, at the small daycare I run, I turned around to put something away. I heard a splashing sound and then saw one of my kids vomiting. He puked several times, and managed to hit the only rug in the entire house. FML
Today, after changing and dressing my 6-month-old into his super cute brand new outfit, I saw the telltale sign of him about to vomit. Without thinking, I cup my hand under his mouth and catch it all. I had to sit there with a hand full of puke and nowhere to dump it. FML
Today, I had to go pick up my kid, because he threw up while playing at his friend's house. The boy's mother bitched me out for not keeping my son at home while he was "ill". Her breath was unspeakably foul. So foul that it caused me to throw up too. FML
Today, a mother and son were in my office. The kid wasn't feeling well and threw up. Mom covered his mouth with her hand, creating a vomit nozzle and covering me in puke. She yelled that I deserved to be sprayed on because I was not quick enough in getting a bucket for her son. FML
Today, I was at work, the Disney Store. A little boy was crying so I went over to him. After talking to him for a little while I found out he couldn't find his mother. When he became comfortable I went to help him stand up, he choked back his tears and then puked all over me from the waist down. FML
Today, while riding the bus to a really important job interview the child sitting next to me threw up in my lap. His mother then told him to wipe his mouth. He used my sleeve. FML
Today, one of the kids at the daycare center I work at was so excited at the fact that his constipation was over, he felt the need to bring me his fecal matter, in his hands, to show me. Guess who had to clean up the aftermath. FML
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Top comments
miss_jelly 0
so having a kid spit up some mystery object in your hand is okay, but puke isn't...
containsnosoy 0
So when a kid may be choking, your first reaction is to stick your hand in their face instead of, you know, trying to save their life? It sucks that you were puked on, but it wouldn't have sucked more if the boy died. Plus, you work at a daycare, this is almost inevitable.
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Comments (89)
541 0
I thought this was an FML. But nope.
Phallus_fml 0
YDI for pretending to know it all.
bhatz 0
you are so stupid I bet the kid wad even smart enough to know not to put your hand infront of his mouth. seriously what is putting your hand infront gonna do?
altna 4
FFS! You work at a DAYCARE and you're not ready to see some puke and poo? With kids anything can happen. If it bothers you so much, quit and never have kids. Problem solved.
namhowell 6
So? Take care of the sick kid and stop whinning. His life probably sucks more than yours right now!
the_spike_i_like 0
OMFG are u kidding me. You got puke on your hands, not your clothes, not in your hair on a hand. You sound like you should enroll yourself in the day-care, big baby.
omgmorganomg 0
read it over. there is NO back slapping..
smackieonassis 0
Um, if you work in a day care centre, getting puked on is basically part of the job description. You want to work with kids, this is what you sign up for. Do your job and stop your whining.
rep0221 0
I wasn't whining fyi, just telling a story which comes with my joob lots of stories. just laugh at it and don't be such a negative @ss
911lovesme 0
Next time use a bucket
rep0221 0
Wow, some of you peole are really rude. this is my FML and it's funny. laugh at my fail thats what i wanted you to do. but instead you make rude comments. I'm not stupid he obviously wasn't choking because he was able to cough therefore air was getting through his airways. But he did look like he had something in his mouth, so i put my hands in front of his mouth and told him to spit it out. When he went to spit it out he puked into my hands. The little boy was fine in the end just made himself sick from coughing and having a small cold. I have worked in daycare for 3 years so I know what the hell I'm doing. Yeah i have been thrown up on, spit up on, and shit on. but i love my job and stuff happens so whatever. but you people need to calm down and laugh at this really.