Today, at 1am, the girl of my dreams that I've been trying for over three years to date, finally asked me out via SMS. Too bad I was asleep at the time. She now thinks I've rejected her, and will no longer speak to me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I finally got the girl of my dreams' phone number. After texting her "Hey, is this Stephanie?" I got response saying "Sorry bro, I know how you feel, she did the same thing to me." FML
Today, the woman I have been seeing said she couldn't see a future with me. This was all because I didn't text her back when I fell asleep after working a double night/morning shift. FML
Inebriated utterances
Today, after the girl I fell head over heels for asked me out last night, it turns out she was so drunk at the time, she doesn't remember and doesn't want to date me at all. I'm beginning to feel like my life is some shitty movie. FML
Today, the girl of my dreams that I've been dating for months called me. Apparently she's been having recurring nightmares of me cheating on her. She dumped me "just in case." FML
Today, my girlfriend fell asleep while I was proposing. FML
Today, I finally got the guts to ask out my crush. She said yes and I was really happy. Then I woke up. FML
Today, two days after sending her flowers for Valentine's Day, my dream girl asked me on a date. She didn't show up. Her boyfriend did though. FML
Life ain't a movie, son
Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams, the girl I've loved for 3 years. I went to her desk and surprised her with roses, chocolates, and played “All I Want for Christmas is You.” She said no. On top of that, she ate all the chocolates. FML
Today, the girl of my dreams, the one person I've met in my life that I could see myself spending the rest of it with, told me she loves me. She then specifically added "...but not in that way, so we could never be together." FML
Shutdown
Today, I finally built up the courage to confess my love to the girl of my dreams. She turned me down. When I asked her about all the recent receptive behavior toward me, she replied, "I thought it'd be funny." FML
Top comments
RipIt 0
that's rather unreasonable, she probably would've turned out to be a crazy controlling bitch anyway
Squander 3
Let me get this straight, if someone doesn't answer a message sent at ONE IN THE MORNING it is assumed that the person's dead or hates them? That's just a terrible tale, FYL.
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Comments (138)
kei1108 13
well, she seems like an airhead. you don't need her anyway.
DalekScythe 0
why the hell would she message at 1 a.m. !
chelseaaababyyy 17
is she retarded ? geez, tell her you were sleeping..
zwcs 4
that makes no sense really. not everyone has their phone attached to their hands 24/7. she's an idiot.
Splayd 10
She seems intellectually vapid, and emotionally unstable.
sniperxz 0
maybe she was drunk
GingerLaxBro 3
Aww dude i hope u bang her real soon
souljacker 11
if she couldn't wait till morning then it probably didn't matter that much to her!
charvisioku 22
So this FML is about you accidentally depriving yourself of a crazy, controlling girlfriend? Oh what a shame.
Trickiest_K 9
That is the ******* dumbest thing Iv ever heard, stupid bitch