Today, as part of my job as a swimming instructor, I had to help a teenage boy learn how to float. This involves supporting the person's back as they try to float. His boner stood straight up. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, in my lifeguarding course, I had to pull a 200-pound boy out of the pool in an exercise to practice using our legs when lifting. I, being only 90 pounds, tried pulling and ended up falling into the pool, landing with my lady parts on his face. FML
Today, my dad taught me how to swim. I had to keep doing a lot of strange movements to keep my body floating. While doing that, two 8-year-old girls came and asked me if i needed help getting out of the water. I'm a 20 year old guy. FML
Today, I was working my lifeguard job when I had to remind a 17 year-old boy that water is clear and that I could see him pulling his trunks down to moon his friends. Kind of want to drown myself now. FML
Today, I was forced to get up in front of ten swim teams, including my own, and a hundred spectators to swim 100 yards with an obvious boner sticking out of my suit. FML
Today, I was teaching swim lessons. I got felt up by a 6 year-old boy. Three times. FML
Today, I was working as a swim instructor for kids. Teaching them not to be afraid of the water, I put my face in the water and blew bubbles. I asked them to try it. All of them did, except for one. I went right to him and blew bubbles again. He then said to me, "But I just peed in that water." FML
Today, I was teaching swimming. A small boy said his stomach hurt, so I placed him on my back and carried him to the main building where he could lay down. He then jumped off my back and ran back towards the beach because 'he felt better'. I had explosive diarrhea all over my back. FML
Today, while lifeguarding over children at work, I started thinking about my girlfriend and got a hard on. Before I realized it, I saved a kid and then hopped out of the pool next to a 5 year old in front of my managers and a little over 50 patrons with a raging boner. My HR meeting is tomorrow. FML
Today, we were swimming in gym class. There are some cute girls in our class and they were wearing their bikinis. I was looking at them when I got an erection but since I was underwater I thought no one would see. I'm on the diving team so my teacher asked me to demonstrate a dive to the class. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went for a swim in his pool. I was hoping that the swim would be somewhat romantic, however, that came to an abrupt end when he decided that it would be cool and funny to try and lift me up by my boobs. FML
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Top comments
that1kid82 2
Wood floats
MrClean17 15
He was probably even more embarrassed than you were
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Comments (135)
gregkingsley 4
No shrinkage for that guy. Good job OP
ILoveThaneKrios 1
Lets just say that the measure of an individual can be difficult to discern by actions alone....
immason 0
omfg thane quote ftw you get 10 internets
TheyCallMeDamien 18
He was very happy with your instruction.
athos1237 4
Sounds more like bragging than a FML. "I'm so hot I made a teenage boy erect just by touching him."
teresee 8
Is that a noodle in your pants? Or are you just excited to see me?
aliciamarie1 8
Maybe he was using it as a flotation device?
NirotJ 2
Meanwhile... Today, I had a cute instructor on my swimming lesson and I got a boner, it was so embarrassing it stuck straight out the water as I was trying to float and everybody saw, fml
Anonymousx3x 4
I'm waiting for the FML story that says, "Today I got a boner while my hot swimming instructor was holding my back to teach me how to float."
TheEASON 3
Actually I think HE should be writing this!
nvo 6
Take it as a compliment. Better yet, ignore it. I am sure he was mortified.