Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dad made a big show of sending me to my room and grounding me for a week. Not because he heard me cursing at my video game, but because I "swear like a little girl" and it embarrassed him in front of his friends. FML
Today, my mum yelled "Son of a bitch!" as I narrowly beat her at a game of Mario Kart. I jokingly yelled back "Hell yeah I am!" Now I'm grounded for two weeks, birthday included, all because my mum's a sore loser. FML
Today, my 12-year-old son played QWOP on my laptop. Half an hour later, he virtually destroyed it in a fit of rage. FML
Today, my bus got held up in traffic, so I arrived home about 15 minutes late. My mum bitched me out, accused me of sleeping around, and grounded me. All this while my brother raged at his video game in the other room, screaming stuff such as "EAT SHIT, YOU CUNTS!" with total impunity. FML
Today, my dad grounded me for not having any friends. FML
Today, my dad and mom and I were going out to eat dinner. My dad wanted a romantic dinner just with my mom so he told me to make an excuse not to go. I did, which ended up as a huge fight, grounded and phone taken away. My dad just stood there in the background putting thumbs up. FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he had an intense argument with the microwave, resulting in him threatening to ground me after I tried to calm him down. FML
Today, my father was cussing loudly because he lost at a Clash Royale game. He then blamed it on me for not sending him cards, and threatened to delete me from all his social media accounts. Dad, I love you, but you're downright insane. FML
Today, I briefly left my laptop while I went to use the toilet. When I came back, I found "I" had posted on Facebook, calling my mom a "stupid cunt who should just stay in the kitchen." The only other person home at the time was my grandpa. She didn't believe it, and permanently grounded me. FML
Today, my dad grounded me for swearing, after I read a funny comment on Youtube to my sister. The supposed swear word? "YOLO." FML
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Top comments
sens3sfailing 25
it sounds like your dad is either awesome, or needs to quite his job as a rat farmer.
Welshite 40
Your username is "goodbye cruel world"? You brought this on yourself.
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Comments (106)
fmfreakinlife 3
You must train!!
kyarush 10
Noob. Owned by your parental? Tisk Tisk!
sens3sfailing 25
OP wont have much time for that while they are grounded, and even when they try to they will probably screen at the squeakers on CoD and get grounded again for yelling profanity at them, even though they swear every other word.
LaLince 40
You must plane!!!
typark123 7
Dude... My parents own pretty hard in CoD
CH1CKEN_FL1PPEN 4
Should've picked a game that actually requires skill op
ozone9914 2
at least the op has a life
cnator 12
Just because he's not very good doesn't mean he has a life, and just because someone is good doesn't mean they don't.
HKCgrimmjow 15
Parents will do anything... Absolutely anything to prove themselves right or to win something. Never misjudge the power of parents
IscoreOnU 19
He can't. He's grounded ;)
patrickalamo 48
Train you must... Young one
llZombiell 5
._. I can't tell. Does he or doesn't he have a life?
tressie_fml 6
Train the starter! That's the key to the battle!
sens3sfailing 25
it sounds like your dad is either awesome, or needs to quite his job as a rat farmer.
codyjohn17 5
That was hi-*******-larious!
sens3sfailing 25
Quit*
pickles1994 18
Or his dad is like a pro screen peeker noob!
mootoo31 6
Time for a rematch.
MrSassypants 34
So he can either get quadruple the grounding, or go back to his original two week grounding.
sens3sfailing 25
it usually goes double or nothing, not double or only lose the original amount...
MrSassypants 34
I know, but then again, the father basically has the say in it. The father could even add more time because he lost, which at first, is where I thought the FML was heading towards.
sens3sfailing 25
that is where it went...he doubled it...know you are just confusing me...
MrSassypants 34
I meant he, the father, lost. I thought the father was going to lose and double the punishment anyways before I even finished reading the FML. That's usually how I see it go but instead, the father won and grounded him with a fair reason, instead of being the loser, and grounding him anyways just because he, the father, lost.
sens3sfailing 25
oooooh, okay! now it all makes sense, sorry for misunderstanding!
DarkHelmet 10
Your Dad beat you at CoD... Two things: your Dad is awesome and you got pwned
whosindahouse 9
Which CoD?
ukrainianitalian 2
You have been defeated. Don't let this happen again!
ukrainianitalian 2
The battled is lost. But the war is not over!
verkaderk 9
Well either you are terrible at COD or your dad is a god
nnnope 26
Or both.
gc327072 31
A GoD? No? Okay...
FizzyApple 3
At least he gave you a chance!
Jjgibbs 5
Op- you are no longer allowed to play xboc
DomDomxoxo 16
#29, #6 is not OP. ... But you already knew that.
marxistbkly 3
Or maybe, by choosing CoD, his dad set him up to be pawned.
LaLince 40
Your half-jockingly done offer was taken seriously: YDI.
newbiehere99 6
What?
CaptTeemo 10
I think he meant dumb instead of done..
onlychildFTW 34
And I think he meant jokingly not jockingly.
Welshite 40
Your username is "goodbye cruel world"? You brought this on yourself.
KalCountry76 12
If someone, especially your dad, accepts that kind of wager and bets like that, you should be scared.
loserboii 11
Let me guess, he survived through all the bullets you shot at him and he knifed you?
CommonSenseDied 2
LMAO! This is what my son screams all during the game! Really pisses him off.