Today, as a means of getting over my abusive ex, I decided to write his name on a piece of paper and light it on fire. As I lit the paper up, I noticed the marker ink had bled through it. The paper is gone, but his name is forever engraved on my desk. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was moving. While packing, I found an old photo that had been laying face down in the bottom of a drawer for some time, and some of the ink transfered to the drawer lining. There is now an image of my ex-girlfriend's face permanently burned into the bottom of my nightstand drawer. FML
Today, I decided to light a candle in my room. Since fire intrigues me, I put an old brochure into it. Paper burns fast, and now my carpet has a big, black burn mark. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me by writing "we're through fat slob" on my forehead whilst I was asleep in permanent marker. FML
Today, I got piss drunk. Being a tattoo artist, I came to the intoxicated conclusion that I could save much more money doing my own tattoos on myself. I now have my ex-boyfriend's name permanently on my thigh. It's not even spelled right. FML
Today, my boyfriend dumped me by writing a breakup note with permanent marker on my newly painted bedroom wall. FML
Today, my therapist told me to write any negative thoughts that I had on a piece of paper and then set fire to it. When I lit it in the trash can, huge flames broke out and I had to throw the trash can out my window to keep from setting my house on fire. FML
Today, I poured my heart out into what had to be my greatest set of lyrics for my band ever, at the same time my teacher was explaining chemical changes to the class. At the end of the lecture he picked up my paper, and set it on fire to demonstrate a chemical change. FML
Today, I got a tattoo with my boyfriend's name on it. As we're coworkers, I showed it to him thinking he’d love it. He told me he couldn’t continue the relationship anymore since he realized he wants to fix things with his wife. Three hours of pain and 2 years down the drain. FML
Today, my boyfriend took a picture of us together because he wanted to have something to burn when we break up. FML
Today, I lit a used tissue on fire in my room. Eventually, the fire became kinda of large (it was a big tissue) and when I blew it out, it fell on the carpet. Now I have a burn stain on it. FML
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Top comments
smashgrab 0
Sandpaper will remove it, then use some touch up varnish to make the sanded patch blend in with the rest of the desk. Congrats on getting rid of an abusive ex, though!
felipe87 2
yea! now you get to torch a desk. bigger is better
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Comments (146)
lil_miss_piss 2
Goof off, rubbing alcohol, nail polish remover, all these things work. Start scrubbing, and great job ditching the b*tch!
cbr600_fml 0
do you drink champagne vodkas? that's what classy broads drink
lil_miss_piss 2
No,but I have just recently discovered Pomatinis. I prefer beer though, don't like the sweet drinks much.
wert12 0
haha that's wat u get!!!
Brittneyyyy 7
Wtf did you write his name on the paper with a knife? How is it engraved on the desk? If you mean stained there's a thousand ways to get rid of it so no big deal.
lil_miss_piss 2
Where in any part of the post did it say it was engraved?
Brittneyyyy 7
"...but his name is forever -engraved- on my desk. FML"
lil_miss_piss 2
It also says the marker ink bled through it. I need to find me some markers that can carve wood. Engraved was her way of saying permanent. She just doesn't know there are ways to remove permanent ink without removing the entire desk.
Insanitytest 1
Regardless of what OP meant, it definitely did have the word "engraved."
lil_miss_piss 2
So I had to read after a couple times, my mind focused on the marker part. Marker is not the same as engraving, so I just automatically blotted that out. Thanks for repeating that to me though!
ubunchofpanzies 0
Stop being a bitch
mr_miyagi 0
"forever engraved?" really? i didnt know that theres not one way to wash off marker stains. looks like op is s.o.l.
LoveMySoldier82 0
A little paint and voila out of your life.
LoveMySoldier82 0
A little paint and voila out of your life.
jfarrow9703 11
Lighter fluid will take that off
TheCheyenneMorga 3
You should have used a ball point pen instead.
eGavik94 0
"Engraved?" Either you confused a marker for a knife, you don't know what "engraved" means, or both. Either way, you're an idiot, especially for thinking that burning his name will help. At all.