Today, after my shift at the police station, I went on a date with a girl I recently met. We had a great date, that is until I opened the car door for her, and out of habit, pushed down on her head as she got in. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was on a date with this girl. I attempted to put my arm around her, but I elbowed her in the face instead. FML
Today, I went out on a date with a girl for the first time. I opened her car door for her and then slammed her leg in it upon closing. She will be in a cast for 6 weeks. FML
Today, I met a girl at a bar. After buying her a few drinks, we decided to head back to her place. Not wanting to leave either of our cars, I followed her home. While driving, she sent me text because she missed her exit. I tried to text her back something witty and instead rear ended her. FML
Today, I went to the movies with my girlfriend. As I started putting my arm around her, I hit her in the face. FML
Today, I asked a girl out and made plans to go see a movie. About 5 minutes in, I made a move to put my arm around her and smashed her in the face. FML
Today, I went on a date with a girl that I really like. I picked her up from her house, and as I was pulling out of her driveway, I hit her dad's BMW, knocking off the bumper. FML
Today, at work, I decided to try and impress this girl walking behind me by holding the door open for her. As she was walking through, I inadvertently pulled the door too hard. It slammed against the wall and ricochet back, hitting her right in the face. FML
Today, I went on a date with a great girl; we went out to dinner and saw a movie. After the movie, we went out to my car to find out that a homeless man had broken the window, climbed into it, and was eating the leftover pasta with his fingers. FML
Today, I was on a date with a girl I've had feelings for since I was 14 (I'm 22). I took her out to dinner, then to a movie that we both liked and had a few drinks afterwards. I thought it was going really well until I was driving her home and she asked to be dropped off at her boyfriend's house. FML
Today, I went out with a girl who I really love. We arrived to her house and before she got out of the car, I attempted to kiss her as planned. Still drunk, I grabbed her head and twisted it when I kissed her. She's now wearing a neck brace. Real smooth. FML
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Top comments
bibbster18 11
Hey man, you never know maybe she likes that kind of stuff.
gribbles 12
Haha! Force of habit. I constantly find myself yelling corner when walking around corners no matter where I'm at.
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Comments (246)
patrickalamo 48
Occupational hazard.
vbmg152 19
Apologize, if she's worth dating, she'll understand! I dated a cop a long time ago. You have to be understanding to date a cop! It wasn't my thing! Good luck!
krewer21 1
Wow, dude are so forever alone you can not make a smooth move? Consider role playing to see if she liked your clumsy move?
journeytotheend 16
Oh come on that's a laughable moment
blahblahblah5_x 13
Oh my god! lol, poor girl.. at least you won't be short for conversation xD
mazdamanpr5 3
The question is did you make her sit in the backseat!
bmwilliams 7
Role play! Kinky ;)
RomanBeauty 0
Lol! That's the best one I've read in a while
Bikrbum 6
Sounds like a great "On our first date" story to tell the grand kids.
vero559 7
Lol. I would have been pissed if that was me