Today, after my dad trying every bait, hormone, and poison, the cockroaches in this apartment have gone crazy. They are trying to kill themselves. One tried to commit suicide, by suffocation, in my mouth this morning. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, an exterminator sprayed for cockroaches in my dorm room. After classes I got back to find three large cockroaches on top of my bed. Now that the exterminator has sprayed everything, all the cockroaches are coming out. FML
Today, my apartment was flooded due to a broken pipe, which caused a huge family of cockroaches to disperse. Did you know they can fly? FML
Today, my Dad and I killed a cockroach with a large metal pole. It was the most bonding experience we have ever had. FML
Today, I woke up, showered, and began brushing my teeth. When I started to brush my tongue I gagged, like usual, and threw up a little. What's unusual? I threw up a cockroach. FML
Today, I walked out the back door of my place of employment and looked down to see a huge cockroach. This is quite a normal occurrence, so I thought nothing of it until I realized it was struggling to drag the corpse of one of its friends into the building. FML
Today, I got up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. I felt something get caught in my throat so I coughed and spluttered a bit. When I turned on the lights I discovered I'd coughed up a cockroach. FML
Today, I woke up with a dead cockroach and its guts all over my forehead. My boyfriend responded by laughing and saying "Poor guy, never had a chance to see the world." FML
Today, my son found a cockroach in his bed. I had to kill the thing and wash all his sheets and stuffed animals before he'd finally agree to go back to bed, three hours later. FML
Today, I woke up with a cockroach in my ear. FML
Today, I woke up to the sight of a dead fly on my bedside table, being eaten by a swarm of ants. I screamed so bad that my dad said he thought my sister was being murdered in my room. FML
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Top comments
pam241 15
I think I just threw up
confusedAsFuck 34
Extra protein mate.
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Comments (98)
Metal_Chick 15
From experience, I can say it is hard to take care of problem yourself. Roaches can become immune to certain things over time. Call an exterminator to fumigate your house; best damn $70 I've ever spent.
youngboob 5
oh we jave. theyve been to thia apt complex several times
MrsKilown 20
Apartment complexes are impossible to treat. More than likely they are under the structure of the complex. They can also live in the walls. Only option is to hope for a fire, and hope it reaches your apartment.
junkman6 22
It may sound nasty, because it is, but butter a piece of toast or put some honey on toast and leave it in the bottom of a 5 gallon bucket every day before school/work. Make sure the roaches have a way to get in, a ramp or something. And every day when you get home torch the bucket. It doesn't get rid of the problem but it seriously limits the numbers. I did it for a while when I lived in some shitty apartments.
foxwasalamb 24
reasons 1-100 why i enjoy living in alaska.
Isa_fml 20
I'm so glad I have cats. They eat anything that even tries to get in here. Other units in our building have problems, but we're totally fine except for the occasional itsy bitsy spider.
BubbleGrunge 18
This is my kind of NOPE! Everyone's scared of spiders; I'll take a dozen spiders over cockroaches ANYDAY! This is the time to burn down the house and run!
tony1891 22
or you could just call an exterminator. cheaper than burning your house down.
orbit 22
The scorched earth policy would work well here.
BBeffedmylife 28
Amen to that, #14!
BubbleGrunge 18
Then I have to pick up the dead ones....burning it down sounds much better!
HappyItalian 38
Maybe your breath is just deadly enough to kill.
MrsKilown 20
The shitty thing about roaches is they are very hard to get rid of. Even if you move they can hide in your belongings. I had a roach problem once, and know that it is a horrible thing to deal with. The best of luck to you OP!
ileenefudge 29
I have the Same issue with roaches. I was NOT told that roaches already had infested the apartment complex, and when asked about it they denied the claims of ever having roaches, which obviously made me mad and the landlord is too cheap to get a decent exterminator, despite everyone's pleas in the complex. We all have them and nothing is working to get rid of them. If I had known from the getgo that there were roaches I would have never moved in here.
Bravehooves 7
Maybe you should just move out..
youngboob 5
they hide in your belongings also...
i_love_giraffes 5
Go on Amazon and get a pound of food grade DE (diatomaceous earth) and a special dusting tool. Spread it into the cracks of your cupboards, under sinks, along baseboards, or anywhere else you're finding them. It is not poison, it is ground up sea shells (essentially), and even though its a fine powder to us it scratches their shells, gets inside and dehydrates them so they die. Also put a ziplog bag over your faucets at night and seal with duct tape, dry out sinks, and put a little bit of bleach in the toilet after you use it. They are attracted to water, so if you offer none, they will start to go elswhere. Seriously, though, the DE will really help the problem. It will also kill bedbugs, so there's that extra insurance.
ab28 12
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Maybe if you cleaned your house you wouldn't have bugs
cinskeep43 15
even immaculate homes can become infested
ChristianH39 30
OP had posted above and lives in an apartment complex. doesn't matter how spotless your apartment is if someone else in the building has them.
Summoner_T3L 15
Easy fix OP: Invent combustible lemons and burn your house down... with the lemons!
GentlemanBastard 15
I had one drop from the ceiling and land on my face before. Three showers later I still didn't feel clean. Disgusting little creatures, and damn near impossible to get rid of once they infest. Good luck, OP.
worldclassrager 41
I like how this was phrased...