Today, after a long time convincing my parents that my boyfriend is really a good guy, not only did he decide to come by the house completely drunk, but he also ended up trying to kiss my mom, thinking it was me. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out that my father, who very recently lost his wife, decided that drunkenly hitting on my long-time boyfriend's mom was a good idea. FML
Today, my mom came home, shitfaced drunk. She thought I was my dad and gave me a forceful kiss, with a lot of tongue. She then pulled away, stared at me, screamed in horror, and spewed all over me. I puked too. FML
Today, I had to get my boyfriend's mom to help me get my boyfriend in his house because he was so drunk. He broke up with me for getting him in trouble. FML
Today, it was Thanksgiving and the first time my boyfriend would be meeting my whole family. He was nervous so he started drinking. By the end of the night, he was belligerently drunk and kissed my aunt twice thinking it was me. FML
Today, my very drunk mom called me to confess that she was the girl that my boyfriend left me for two years ago. FML
Today, I was told by my girlfriend that in the thralls of my drunken haze last night, I tried to French-kiss her mom. FML
Today, my dad got so drunk that he proposed to me. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over. My mom told him the story about the time she caught me having sex with my ex-boyfriend. My ex is his best friend. FML
Today, I brought my boyfriend of a year and a half to meet my parents. Turns out he dated my mom. This should be a fun dinner. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house and we were just about to kiss. Until his mum walked in saying his girlfriend was at the door. I thought I was already there. FML
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Top comments
unidentified_sta 5
A compliment to the mother... as for the OP not so much.
2fknreaL 0
At least you know he likes your mom.
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Comments (70)
mathew17986g 2
maybe you were wrong about him....
alaaloo_fml_fml 0
Lesson learned: don't ever EVER lie to your parents hahaha.
All_For_Love 0
Better lesson: learn to lie better :) problem solved
alaaloo_fml_fml 0
24- Some people just cannot master that art. I on the other hand, am a black belt super master of lying to my folks. Can now do so without blinking.
turturkeykey 0
It all kinda gets ruined though once he barges in wasted. Da liez don't getcha very fawr
alaaloo_fml_fml 0
32- Exactly.
btor417 0
hey 32 r u a sargeant?
All_For_Love 0
Parents: 1 You: 0 . Epic fail... is he really worth it? 0.o
FMLephant 2
Is your mom hot?
jansdo 1
I think there's a reason you've had to work so hard to convince you parents. They already knew he was no good. Next time listen to them.
Deefatboy 0
Not cool
gusgus36 5
well... maybeeeee he's not such a great guy after all. if this was a one-time slip in his character, hopefully your parents will give him another chance.
xgetxbentx 13
if she's having to convince them that he's good, it's probably not a one time slip, it's probably normal for him to do that kind of thing
perdix 31
Explain to your parents that you have to settle for whatever you can get -- seeing that you look to be 20-40 years older than your actual age.
aliaysleighbasic 0
oh god. "you shoulda seen the faces on my dad an mom when I brought over my date, for the senior prom my dad looked at me and said, "she ain't no kid, she's just a cocktail waitress in a dolly parton wig" I know it dad, ain't it cool, that's the kind I dig! I like my women just a lil' on the trashy side..." totally what song came to mind after reading your comment!
FMLephant 2
what happened to the tractors?
HO3 0
Dump him!!
grandpaearthling 2
did he then blurt out "I clean shit for a living"
Vernichten 0
^great >.<