Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while I was working at a gas station, a man came up to the register with his zipper undone and his penis hanging out in full view. I had to awkwardly hand him his change while trying not to look or make eye contact. FML
Today, I was walking down the street and I saw an old man, and me feeling nice I asked him if I could help him cross the street. He responded with: "Only if you let me touch your tits." FML
Today, while I was waiting at a bus stop, a man stopped at the red light and smiled at me. I smiled back. He blew me a kiss and drove away, just as I realized he was masturbating behind the wheel. FML
Today, while jogging in the park, a confused elderly gentleman asked me for directions, so I told him how to get to where he needed to go. He paused for a long moment, then asked me if he could eat me out. FML
Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML
Today, I was walking home when I made eye contact with some guy, just being friendly. He then started rapping at me while pointing at his dick. FML
Today, I came home to see my husband talking to his penis. FML
Today, I was walking down the street and while stopped at a light, this old man waved at me. Thinking nothing of it, I walked through a parking lot to get to where I was going, where he not only followed me, but mistook me for a prostitute. It was 5pm. FML
Today, while babysitting a six year-old boy, he asked me if I could show him my "boobies." I said no, that wouldn't be very appropriate. Suddenly, he pulled down his undies and pointed at his package while exclaiming, "Look, my penis is on again!" It was pointing RIGHT at me. FML
Today, I was at work. I had a male patient expose himself to me. He then apologized and said he thought that's what I wanted. FML
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Top comments
Araj_Hs 19
I hope you directed your hand to his face, and his path to the police station!
Enslaved 38
Hope you then gave him directions to hell!
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Comments (157)
xxlittlemsanime 24
Kick him in the penis and stomp his balls off OP. That must've been a horrible sight to see.
askullnamedbilly 33
Honestly I'd be much more disturbed by someone stomping a creep's balls off than watching that creep ********** in public.
maz08 11
I hope you directed him to the sex offenders register
frostedfoster 15
Just out of curiosity.. Why did it take 5 minutes to give directions? But still, gross.
Flaming_Pandas 15
Some people are truly unworthy of their man-parts.
laden_swallow09 35
Speaking as a man, I agree with you.
tonyfan00 38
@100 Ditto.
archery_master 9
Run as far away from him as you can
JHam12 14
what a creep. people like that should be locked up
FearDaLivingTWF 6
It's called sex offender
gracehi 33
I hope you ****** him up and not in the fun way.
Goblin182 27
You should have said, "I don't know, I can't see it from here".
gracehi 33
Bazinga.
stephanyovalle 15
When a woman is harassed by a creep, should never say things like that. You don't know if the person is aggressive, might be planing to kidnap you or worst. You need to step back and if possible, scream or run to a crowded place.
sturschaedel 27
Yeah, first priority is to get out of the situaton safely.
GamerPerson 19
Honestly, I would said something along the lines of: "No, but I'm sure the police likes the act of public indecency more."
Mitchellbassists 29
This deserves a follow up!