Today, a guy came to install a modem in my apartment. He needed to get to the jack behind my TV stand, so I helped him move it. Once the stand was moved, I saw a used condom that was hidden underneath. My cat must have pulled it out of my garbage weeks ago. There's no way the guy didn't see it. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I hooked up with a girl. The condom fell off when I pulled out. When the girl left, I couldn't find it. I saw my roommate cat's with it, so I chased him and he escaped. My roommate now wants to kill me. She found the condom on her bed and doesn't believe me. I might have to move out. FML
Today, my girlfriend's mother called her in the bedroom for a serious talk. I overheard them arguing and yelling at each other. It turns out her mother found a condom next to her garbage. We got caught because her cat swallowed the condom and threw it up. FML
Today, at work, I found a used condom in the fax machine. I'm the electrical maintenance repair for the company. I have to untangle it from the belts. FML
Today, I whacked off with a condom on and left it in the living room waste basket so it looked like I finally had sex with someone. FML
Today, I was cleaning out from underneath my bed and found a used condom. I've never had sex in my own room. FML
Today, I woke up with a used condom on my face. Turns out my roommate had sex with his girlfriend during the night and instead of getting up and throwing it away, he decided to throw it across the room. FML
Today, I grabbed my t-shirt off the floor beside the bed and got up to walk my boyfriend's dog. After several trips around the block, and plenty of strange looks, I got back upstairs and saw the used condom stuck to my sleeve from the night before. FML
Today, at my appliance job, we received a used dryer that needed to be fixed. I took it in the back room to test it. I plugged it in and turned it on. It started to smell so bad that I went to shut it down, but before I did I see two used condoms fly out of the back vent. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were sitting downstairs with my mom. We heard the dog running around upstairs and called him down. He came running down the stairs with a used condom in his mouth. The same condom my girlfriend and I lost two weeks ago. He put it directly in my mom's hands. FML
Today, my boyfriend came onto me in a romantic gesture. We ended up having sex, forgetting that the window repair guy was supposed to come today and do some work on our third floor apartment windows. I still don't know how much he saw. FML
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Top comments
feven 32
He's probably seen worse things if he goes to people's houses often.
Emma1562 35
That sucks but it'll be a funny story to tell
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Comments (59)
monkeytater96 23
Same thing happened to me except it was a pile of cat shit. Cats a total **** tards some times.
NickACD 27
Well on the bright side he might accept other payment if ya know what I mean. (This is a joke please don't rip me to pieces)
scottyj1011 4
I used to be a cable guy and can confirm we've seen a lot worse.
EarlFug 19
"The last cable guy brought his own condoms. Did you? I requested that when I made the service call"
blahhhhhhh85 9
as a cable guy this isn't the most unusual thing to happen to him guarantee
nphill82 21
As a network field tech, I've seen ******, whips, ****, BDSM stuff, etc. I don't judge.
bigdonnie624 15
As a cable guy we do see worse then that. Don't sweat it as long as the rest of your house was in good condition it'll just be a joke like "you wouldn't believe this"
JerryClark 17
That really blows
dleonard 5
as a cable installer, this is by far a normal occurrence
DiabolusIgnis 15
I work for a moving firm, and a used condom is not too disgusting to find. Honestly I think it's more disgusting to find layers of dust, dead skin, spilled drinks etc. than a used condom. Or used drug needles, jeez. Worst thing ever was a mattress that had been in use/bad storage for 20+ years. When we threw it it let go a cloud that was probably where ebola was born.