Today, a frog made my hot tub his new home. I can't stand frogs and he moves lightening fast. I think the only way to get rid of him is to turn the heat on and boil him. Which I would do if my daughter didn't already adore him. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I woke up exhausted because a croaking frog had kept me awake the night before. This has happened every night for the past week, and no matter how far away I take the frog, it always ends up sitting in the same place the next morning. FML
Today, I stepped out of the house for some fresh air. It was still dark out, so imagine my horror when I accidentally stepped on a frog. It squealed for a split second before being crushed beneath my uncovered foot. FML
Today, I tried to have a relaxing soak in the tub. The giant wolf spider that was already in the tub didn't like me trying to set it free outside. It ran right across my feet and back into my house when I dumped it out of a cup outside. I screamed like a little girl. FML
Today, as a frog biologist I was out in the field searching for a relatively rare frog species. After three hours I finally heard the frog call and I crept closer and closer to the sound until... squish... I stepped on the very frog I was trying to collect. They're endangered. FML
Today, my cat has a new hobby: She goes fishing. As in she catches the frogs out of the ornamental pond, then walks into my freshly mopped kitchen with dripping wet, muddy feet. FML
Today, I was backpacking, and I was in a tent. It had rained all day and finally, I was dry. I settled down in my slightly damp sleeping bag. I woke up halfway through the night with a frog on my face and my feet in freezing cold water. Our tent had drifted into a frog pond. FML
Today, I found the carcass of the frog that got into my house last week. It was a horrifying sight, but not nearly as horrifying as the fact that I found it in my refrigerator. No, I don't know how it got in there either. FML
Today, a water snake slithered into our pool. He can have it. FML
Today, I found out that the lump under my carpet that I stomped on to flatten was actually a dead frog that had gotten caught in the wrong place at the wrong time. FML
Today, my 3-year-old daughter put her grow-in-water salamander in my fish tank. The residue from the toy gummed up the filter and killed all the fish. FML
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Top comments
SShelbyy 1
He's her prince charming :)
MetallicaRules19 4
poor frog! dont be a bitch and kill it!
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Comments (176)
mzfoxy31 0
I love frogs!!!!! They're sooo cute!!! :)
lgriffin86 0
umm use a net & get him out. tell your daughter he ran away!
kiakia0131 23
Please don't kill the frog. They are a sign of a healthy environment! I love frogs. I had like seven in my swimming pool last summer.
rawkthrfawkon 0
they make these things called nets... amazing concept. don't boil the frog. damn.
biker827675 0
don't kill it
Bartimaeus 7
stfu frogs are awesome. I have a pet frog that's 12 years old. he's freaking bamf. he's even better than cats.
boatkicker 5
You like frogs and cats? Do you like turtles too, because if so, you get to be my favorite person today.
Clarice1 9
You deserve it for being the kind of person who would boil a frog in a hot tub. What is wrong with you? Thank goodness your daughter seems to be a decent human being.
legendkillaer 0
when she leaves the house get someone willing to catch,kill,cook it then feed it to your daughter eith the face starring at her(:
dt520 4
you have a hot tub and no net? i refuse to believe this.
Lorysa 11
Why boil the poor thing? It's not gonna bite, and the chlorine will kill all the germs in the meantime, if it doesn't kill the frog first. Maybe you can get one those big pond cleaning nets or something and fish him out? Just make sure you aim it away from you if you catch it, or you'll get peed on for sure. xD I learned that quick...