Today, a friend of mine told me that he knew I was into kinky sex, "like getting tied up." I just stared at him, spluttering simple question words and wondering how on earth he could possibly know that about me. I then realized that he had been joking. Too late. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I jokingly had kinky conversation via text message with a good guy friend. He was pretending to be a stranger and was fishing for compliments, and asked to have a foursome. Turns out, my friend lost his phone and I spent 2 hours talking to a pervert about what lingerie I was wearing. FML
Today, I was working at my desk when a colleague came over to my desk and said, “You loiter in gay bars”. I started having a panic attack because I thought he'd found out and would out me to my wife. Only when he began cracking up laughing did I realise it was a "joke." FML
Today, I hooked up with a friend. I expressed an interest in it becoming something more. He expressed an interest in not telling anyone and pretending it never happened. FML
Today, I found out that the “stranger” I’ve been confessing my kinky, dark, and disgusting fantasies to online is a friend from high school, who figured out it was me by the third sentence. Now I'm praying she has a heart. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he had any secret sexual fantasies and promised that I wouldn't judge him, hoping to scratch my kinky itch. He looked at me wide-eyed, yelled, "IT'S A TRAP!!" and literally sprinted out of the room. FML
Today, I was fooling around with someone I had met at a club, in my room. It got really heated, and I was really getting into this guy, until he lifts up my leg and asks, "Can I lick your leg?" FML
Today, I was hanging out with a guy friend I hadn't seen for ages. The sexual tension was off the charts. We were making out and think were progressing, hands were roaming to both nether regions when I freaked out and blurted out, "But aren't we just friends?" We then sat and watched TV. FML
Today, I introduced myself as a sex addict, as a joke, to break the ice while meeting new people. One of my friends took me seriously and said he was a porn addict. He told me how happy he was that he had found someone else who had the same feelings and was so happy he could confide in me. FML
Today, I told my best friend that I was gay and that I liked him. Turns out he's very open about the topic. Basically, he kissed me and then slapped me. I don't know what that's supposed to mean. FML
Today, I told my close friend that I have a thing for him. His reaction? "Oh, fuck." FML
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Top comments
xOpheliacx 0
So? Nothing to be ashamed of.
ChefBoy6382 0
Wanna hook up?
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Comments (90)
summersong89 0
OP, you should have just said to him: "Oh, yeah, I am. So what??" I don't really think its anything to be ashamed of...I'm into kinky sex too. Getting tied up/pinned down is really hot.
deathbylaughter 0
Frankly, being kinky is nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed about... Kinky is simply more fun. Definitely not FML worthy, I don't know how this even made it?
fmlstuffhappens 0
ill tie you up =P
jewelzgalore 0
LMAO!!!!!
christopherlove 0
It's the 21st century. Being tied up is about as vanilla as missionary. Now you're a little kinky if you like being shat upon.
waterynuggets 0
Actually that's pretty awesome
colourmealy 0
i dont see the fml here.
Nissi 17
This would be alot more awesome if you were a male, imo. Far more embarrassing.
RideTheCulture 0
ahahahahahahahahaha
Shyman4ever 0
You wanna ****?