Today, a friend of mine told me that he knew I was into kinky sex, "like getting tied up." I just stared at him, spluttering simple question words and wondering how on earth he could possibly know that about me. I then realized that he had been joking. Too late. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I jokingly had kinky conversation via text message with a good guy friend. He was pretending to be a stranger and was fishing for compliments, and asked to have a foursome. Turns out, my friend lost his phone and I spent 2 hours talking to a pervert about what lingerie I was wearing. FML
Today, I was working at my desk when a colleague came over to my desk and said, “You loiter in gay bars”. I started having a panic attack because I thought he'd found out and would out me to my wife. Only when he began cracking up laughing did I realise it was a "joke." FML
Today, I hooked up with a friend. I expressed an interest in it becoming something more. He expressed an interest in not telling anyone and pretending it never happened. FML
Today, I found out that the “stranger” I’ve been confessing my kinky, dark, and disgusting fantasies to online is a friend from high school, who figured out it was me by the third sentence. Now I'm praying she has a heart. FML
Today, I asked my boyfriend if he had any secret sexual fantasies and promised that I wouldn't judge him, hoping to scratch my kinky itch. He looked at me wide-eyed, yelled, "IT'S A TRAP!!" and literally sprinted out of the room. FML
Today, I was fooling around with someone I had met at a club, in my room. It got really heated, and I was really getting into this guy, until he lifts up my leg and asks, "Can I lick your leg?" FML
Today, I was hanging out with a guy friend I hadn't seen for ages. The sexual tension was off the charts. We were making out and think were progressing, hands were roaming to both nether regions when I freaked out and blurted out, "But aren't we just friends?" We then sat and watched TV. FML
Today, I introduced myself as a sex addict, as a joke, to break the ice while meeting new people. One of my friends took me seriously and said he was a porn addict. He told me how happy he was that he had found someone else who had the same feelings and was so happy he could confide in me. FML
Today, I told my best friend that I was gay and that I liked him. Turns out he's very open about the topic. Basically, he kissed me and then slapped me. I don't know what that's supposed to mean. FML
Today, I told my close friend that I have a thing for him. His reaction? "Oh, fuck." FML
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Top comments
xOpheliacx 0
So? Nothing to be ashamed of.
ChefBoy6382 0
Wanna hook up?
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Comments (90)
twixes 0
hey, this aint worthy of FML. it just makes sex that bit more interesting! :P
machine_fml 0
Wanting to be tied up isn't something to be ashamed of, but I can still see why this would be a FML. Private lives are supposed to be kept...in private. I'd be embarrassed if my friends knew all about my sex life.
fuck_YOUR_lives 0
shit i'm masochistic too. basically 95% of people in america are too. don't matter who they are. kinky sex is the best sex. the kinkier the better.
Incitatus 0
95%.. This is why you don't trust wikipedia
dyingstart 0
Ehh, oh well. We all have our kinks. Yeah, bad joke, I know.
element01 0
Theres nothing wrong with that. I dont see why your life should be ******. You will make some dude or chick very very happy!
dramakat11 0
Don't be ashamed. Almost everyone likes some kinky sex at least every once in a while. For most people, the "forbidden" factor is what makes sex hot. The best sex, in my opinion, is with someone you really love and care about and that's all the better reason in my book why you can be truly intimate and share all of your nasty kinky fantasies! My boyfriend and I make sweet love sometimes but most of the time we at least engage in very very dirty talk and do some slapping, biting, spanking, tying up, gagging, hair pulling...It's primal instinct.
open_book 0
kinky sex is awesome :D
xfrankenstienx 0
Uhmm,why is that a reason to **** you life? Dear,I've been through worse.Don't cry over spilled milk.
daganliberal 0
Nothing to be ashamed about! I LOVE kinky!
purple_mongoose 0
nothing wrong with being tied up