Today, I was at a concert. During the concert, my shoelaces went undone, so I bent down to tie them. Not two seconds later, the girl behind me jumped on my shoulders and refused to get down. She said "tall guys" are the best to ride on during concerts. My name is Maria. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to a concert. One of my favorite bands was performing, and I'd had the ticket for seven months, with a great seat for the show. It was all going perfectly, that is until a guy twice my height sat in front of me. FML
Today, I went to a concert. Being 6'5" was a great advantage because I could see the stage from wherever I was stood. On the downside, I was used by people as a meeting point. FML
Today, I was riding up an escalator in the mall in uncomfortable high heels. While adjusting my bag I suddenly lost my balance and began flailing wildly. In desperation I hurled forward and ended up grabbing a teenage boy's buttocks and was promptly slapped by his girlfriend. FML
Today, I went to see my favorite band in concert. Not only did the people next to me have a loud conversation through the entire set, the guy behind me repeatedly tried to lecture me for head-butting him. Given he was a foot taller than me, I'm not even sure how that was possible. FML
Today, I was at a metal concert and I met a really cute girl. We got talking, and started getting close. We were about to kiss during the transitional period between 2 bands, but I was then pulled away by her father, who owned the venue. I was thrown out. Before the main act. FML
Today, I went to a local concert. The singer from my favorite band stage-dived and I got to catch him. Unfortunately I was the only one to catch him. The next thing I know I'm pinned between him and the concrete floor as he finishes whatever part of the song he was on. He was fine, I hit my head. FML
Today, I was singing and playing keyboards with my band on stage at a club. A drunken chick from the crowd tried to climb up onto the stage in her heels, fell, and grabbed the back of my mic stand to catch herself. And busted me in the mouth with my own microphone. Then she requested a song. FML
Today, I embarrassed myself by screaming for help in a crowded mall when my shoelace got stuck at the top of the escalator. Someone behind me kicked the shoelace and it came out easily. FML
Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Turns out that bouncers don't think it's a problem for girls to go up on stage and make out with the musicians. FML
Today, I went to a concert with my girlfriend. Some guy grabbed her ass, and I tried to fight him. I ended up with a concussion and a messed up jaw. Her? Oh, she beat the shit out of him while I was unconscious. FML
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Top comments
dacho 7
Maria is a weird name for a guy.
perdix 31
Bending over at a concert is a bad idea. You're lucky you got an entire girl on your back rather that a piece of a guy lower down.
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Comments (176)
pronounciations 5
u have a guys name
gasbreakdipdip 0
ydi for being tall
rushiee 0
haha thats great(:
look_its_me 0
that was one of the dumbest things I've ever read. and FYI, Maria can be a guys name in sone Spanish-speaking countries.
someguy153 0
But what about Muria? Is that a common guy's name too?
SeedlessMe 13
Uh 41- Spanish languages use an 'a' at the end to mean Feminine. Mario would be a man. Sorry, you fail.
SarahBearXoX 0
maybe Mariah would suit better? ;) jk sorry op
lilkim_fml 0
Maria is a very familar name in Denmark, were this post is from:) you can be named Mariah I think, but not exactly Mario XD
seanreddog 4
My mom is Danish! She doesn't look like a man though...
jadedwaitress 0
YDI for being tall? Really? Oh I guess it makes sense since people get to choose their height.
Otto12 0
*also shivers*
seanreddog 4
I got to choose my height.
amanda_gza 0
that's what your face said!
mona_is_here 10
I would've punched her xD
l_s_1_boy 0
pack her ass to the port-a-shitter in the back and drop her in.
RaIeigh 0
Shanking is more effecient.
seanreddog 4
Op stop being ungrateful I'd love it if a girl started riding me at a concert.
fertie226 1
haha YEAH!! a good shank would have done the trick
acccccccc 1
agree with sean
RaIeigh 0
Sean, the Op is a girl.
seanreddog 4
I know.
blindyblonde13 0
hahaha nicee guys. great convo starter.
gasbreakdipdip 0
well ydi for being tall
piinkbunnii 1
Well, what concert did you attend?
littlemissdqgirl 8
op if your upset because she thought you were a guy, then stop dressing like one.
AbnormalAshley 0
Haa " baby bakery " that made me laugh.
lamargus 0
you must be short then cause being tall sounds pretty good to me
Diannaa 0
Haha does the OP have like a man voice too? I can picture her struggling to get the chick off her back, screaming in a deep voice... anyway FYL for being mistaken as a man
storm777 0
I say you let her on your neck and fall backwards and hit the floor. she'll learn her lesson
seanreddog 4
Haha we have this one counselor lady who sounds and looks like a man and even the teachers make fun of her whenever she comes by lol.
JJ1989 6
yo, it must suck being a guy with a girls name. lol, jk. sorry about that incident at the concert
Diannaa 0
62, That's weird because we have a counselor like that too lol except she resembles a toad at the same time.
seanreddog 4
Ya but I don't look like a girl and don't try to so I wouldn't have that problem and anyways I'll take it how I get it as long as she's hot. Anyways lesbian lovin can be pretty hot lol.
piinkbunnii 1
Don't you think shanking is a bit excessive Mr. Raliegh sir?? Isn't tossing her off your back, and then stopping her into the ground until her brains mixes with the dirt well enough??
piinkbunnii 1
Stomping*
deathcab7 0
well thats violent.
zakkyzebra 11
haha a dude with a chicks name. classic prank mom and dad. ? 0.0
seanreddog 4
is that justin beaver throwing up?
deathcab7 0
haha sean i thought that arrow was pointing at your santa cat at first.
KiddNYC1O 22
actually, Maria is also a guys name...
MichieBabiie 0
Lmaoo, you should of smashed her on the floor lol.
NatDancer2010 0
hahah before the surgery it was Mario...sry had to
MadeOfAwesome 1
#90, actually Maria is exclusively a girl's name. Mario would be the masculine version.
roflmaker 0
hence your username, tallwomen.
KiddNYC1O 22
99- seriously, in the hispanic community it is normal for a guy to sport the name MariA lol
megiscool123 0
24- you make a good point
KiddNYC1O 22
rare but normal lol Jose-Maria is a good example
KiddNYC1O 22
let rephrase last points... the name Jose-Maria is normal for a guy the name Maria itself for a guy is rare but also used therefore, it's also a guys name
kybabyy 4
I haven't met one single guy named Maria, and I live in New Mexico. Justsayin.
babyale760 0
110 go to Mexico and yes you will meet a handfull of guys named Jose Maria -- it's very common just like Guadalupe. it's unisex also.
ShadowedHuman 5
that's a weird name for a guy
boyguydudemalema 0
op has guyass that is why
SugarNstrychnine 0
Maria is not a guys name. Where did you get that? Op, I lmao at this! Maybe you look all beefy and manly? What did you do, just let her "ride" you all during the concert? I would have pushed the bitch off. Not too hard, especially since you're big and manly...
xstaticdelta 6
YDI for not beating the crud outta that crackhead for jumping on your shoulders
elmo6 0
she was a girl..
dreamingofnyc 0
not a guys name?
Shivverr 0
Thank you. Someone who has some sense.
thesunsetglow_fml 8
Sure, the op could be Mexican, living in Mexico and the name is as unisex there as Pat or Alex here. BUT CONSIDERING THE OP IS FROM DENMARK I think it's safe to say that the other girl is a complete moron. Unless there's a secret huge Mexican population in denmark /unlikely/
Johnreal123 0
haha sucks for you
gasbreakdipdip 0
FACE-PALM
blindyblonde13 0
haha no worries second is close enuff.
zem5 0
such language!
Tikwichka 5
I'm sure you could have worked out a way of getting her down...one that would also teach her some manners, too.
kyleinsane 0
it's not a ******* girls name. you people are retarded. and OP kill that bitch
asmb100 27
If you're implying throwing her... I like your style.
dacho 7
Maria is a weird name for a guy.
randomguy1millon_fml 0
Jackie Is a werid name for a girl
curlyfry33 8
My friends name is Jade and hes guy......ok fine my name is jade >_>...*silently sobs in the corner*
ScreamForCandy 0
Oh but they are! :D I woulda bit her arm. Roarr.
perdix 31
Bending over at a concert is a bad idea. You're lucky you got an entire girl on your back rather that a piece of a guy lower down.
SeedlessMe 13
hahah exactly perdix--- it could always be worse!!
jadedwaitress 0
You should fake an injury and make her feel like shit. FYL I'm tall and it can really suck sometimes
cactus_fml 0
She was probably really drunk. I saw No Doubt last summer and these extremely drunk girls came up to me and the people I was with and started dancing and spinning us around. I was 15, and I'm a girl, so I was like, uhhhhh okay?
JordynAlexis 0
Put yer 12 year old breasts away. Pedobear is always watching. );
nobridgejustwate 0
PEDOPEDOPEDO. yeah, nobody's lookin', sweetcheeks. put 'em away until they're big enough to shake sweetie.
ilikepie789 0
lol
blindyblonde13 0
okay good... i thought i was the only one who was questioning how old she was.... i was like uhmmm
bse 0
Age is just a number.
HoesInaBox 0
In China, Too Young is just a name
bse 0
Lol, that's quality.
marquez_jasmine 6
Says the 13 year old
CMC_LOVES_MGM 19
Wow that sucks, you should of thrown her down, kicked the shit out of her and to top it off kick her in the kidneys to make her cough up blood!
morgan06 0
that doesnt mean ur not a guy! haha