Today, I was at a fancy family dinner. The dish I'd made was served, and as we ate, I told my aunt that I was a total failure as a cook, explaining everything wrong about my dish, in painful detail. Apparently we'd both made the same dish. That one wasn't mine. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I tried a new recipe for dinner. However, the recipe was written by someone with a penchant for overly dramatic storytelling. I spent the entire evening deciphering the narrative while desperately trying to salvage a dish that ultimately tasted like disappointment. FML
Today, at a family party, my uncles were complimenting my mom on her pies. I cooked them. She took all the credit. FML
Today, I hosted a family dinner. I made a roast, potatoes, green beans, and homemade bread. Everything went smoothly until I realized halfway through I'd used powdered sugar instead of flour. No one noticed at first, then my aunt asked in horror, “Why's it taste like cake?” The rest of the meal was eyed suspiciously and I almost fainted from the stress. FML
Today, I had to be the asshole who finally told one of our friends that his wife can't cook. This was after she tried to make fajitas using a third-rate premade sauce and processed ham, burned it, and stank up the entire house. He seemed shocked when we all agreed; he thought it was good. We all facepalmed. FML
Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. Being a chef of a highly-rated restaurant, I cooked a well-liked dish. Not only did she say no, but commented on how bland and tasteless the meal was. FML
Today, I found a recipe online that looked delicious and not too complicated. Halfway through cooking, I realized I was reading the instructions for two different recipes and had combined them into one horrific dish. The resulting meal tasted like burnt cardboard mixed with regret. My girlfriend ended up ordering takeout. FML
Today, a friend invited me over for dinner. She presented me with a "gourmet" homemade meal. As I started eating, I realized it tasted… off. She looked at me expectantly, so I politely ate it all. Afterwards, she told me it was a new recipe she was trying "tuna casserole" made with canned tuna… which we found out later expired in 2015. FML
Today, I bought ingredients for one of my favorite meals and went home to take a nap. When I woke up, my sister had cooked them for everyone else in the house, who ate it all without me. I was told that I shouldn't be angry, but instead proud of my adult sister because, "She cooked!" FML
Today, I cooked dinner for my boyfriend, hoping to impress him with my culinary skills. I burnt the garlic bread, overcooked the chicken, and managed to set off the smoke alarm three times. When I finally served the meal, my boyfriend said, "It's like a sad buffet at a middle school prom." FML
Today, I posted on Facebook about a cooking mishap I had. My fiancé and ex then spent the next hour trading stories of my other kitchen disasters in the comments. FML
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Top comments
PhoenixChick 26
Don't put people in a position where they HAVE to eat food you made and then go on and on about how terrible it is. You're being annoying, maybe fishing for compliments, and definitely making it impossible for anyone to enjoy their food.
Amy78_fml 11
Next time don't put yourself down so much. Not every recipe is going to work out. Also I don't think that I have ever been to a "fancy family dinner" that was also a pot luck and served by someone else. It is way too early/too late in the year for Thanksgiving FMLs.
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Comments (10)
julfunky 29
YDI. Definitely. No one gives a shit about the “painful details” to begin with.
Amy78_fml 11
Next time don't put yourself down so much. Not every recipe is going to work out. Also I don't think that I have ever been to a "fancy family dinner" that was also a pot luck and served by someone else. It is way too early/too late in the year for Thanksgiving FMLs.
Trinity Fenwick 7
what you did was tacky to begin with even when you thought it was yours. the fact that it was hers just process the point. hope you've learned your lesson.
Yudith 28
Morality: don't put yourself down. You deserve better. And you're a better cook than your aunt!
Sinshine 28
Even if it had been yours, why would you talk down the food people are eating right now? Don't ruin the food for people.
PhoenixChick 26
Don't put people in a position where they HAVE to eat food you made and then go on and on about how terrible it is. You're being annoying, maybe fishing for compliments, and definitely making it impossible for anyone to enjoy their food.
RichardPencil 32
A little unfortunate at the moment, but it’ll be a lot worse after the deluge ... of diarrhea. Your family will blame you and your aunt equally.
TxKitten79 10
Did you not notice it was being served out a dish that looked different from the one you brought yours in?
Lily_Rain77 25
In some cultures it's tradition to insult your own cooking, I don't know the exact protocol for when your cooking really sucks, if you're still suposed to insult it of not... sucks that it was hers though. Next time plan better so you don't end up with two of the same dish.
zoelog 10
sounds like you were looking for attention. ydi