Today, a coworker informed me that she thinks I may be descended from a race of goblins, because of my squat stature, ugly face and hairy arms. She was being completely serious. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a coworker told me I was "fat shaming" them by discussing weight loss with other coworkers. FML
Today, my coworker asked me to add her on Facebook. She has a common name, so I picked the one I thought was her. After no response for a while, I asked for the right spelling. She saw the one I thought was her and said, “I can’t believe you thought I was that ugly.” She wasn't joking. FML
Today, I decided to come out to a co-worker. She looked at me, then laughed, and said, "You can't be gay, you're fat!" FML
Today, at work, I was making an appointment for an old lady who told me, "You look like a movie star!" I started to thank her when she followed up with, "Like that girl from the horror movie! Your black hair and pale skin makes you look scary! Oh, sorry…" with the coworker I hate the most sitting right next to me. FML
Today, I met my coworker's kids during a cookout. I joked to her eldest son that he was awfully short for a seventeen-year-old. He responded, "Well, you're awfully ugly for the town slut." Everyone laughed, including my boss. FML
Today, after weeks of everyone at work avoiding me, I finally asked my coworker what was up. She informed me, “You’re 350lbs and try to dress like an office siren, it’s pathetic to look at.” FML
Today, I confided to my boyfriend that I have a condition that causes me to grow thick toe hair. He now won't stop calling me "the sexy Hobbit." FML
Today, the 6 year old girl I was babysitting asked me, "Why are you so ugly? Are you an alien? Because aliens are about as ugly as you are." FML
Today, at work, a weird old woman came up to me and told me that it's okay: being ugly isn't a choice, it's nothing to be ashamed of, and that it's what inside that counts. She then hugged me and walked away. FML
Today, an overweight coworker of mine was saying that her favorite mythical creatures was Mermaids, because she considers them graceful, carefree and aesthetically beautiful, like her. I absentmindedly blurted out, “Not with that body.” The word “Sorry” didn’t cut it for the write up I received. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Sunako_fml 9
Tell her that you think she descended from a race of bitches.
Levvy 22
Here's how to know for sure: Do people get experience points for hitting you?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (147)
SammieDarling 6
She sounds like a real winner, but in any case ignore her and move on.
bkmo 1
look at the bright side....you won't need a costume for Halloween! :)p
alohalili 0
Oh my goodness she sounds so disrespectful I wouldve slapped the bitch!
AmericanJedhead 10
Buy a goblin costume, put it on and invite her over... tell her that you think the two of you are close enough that you can show her your "face." I dunno, just do something to mock her
mikebazooka3 1
Sounds like something dwight from the office would say....
Axipiter 24
Put a bear trap under her desk, so when she sits down she gets her foot stuck. Then go all wild, and pretend you're about to eat her. Roadhouse.
funky303 6
Actually just file a complaint because of racial abuse (she called you a Troll).
ellytoad 13
How would she know what goblins look like?
Joui_fml 11
Wow. Talk about a rude nature, and being to comfortable with saying shit.
sophie22_fml 8
Maybe she's just socially retarded? Fyl
outoftown 27
#102, OP said she was serious, so I'd go with delusional.