Today, my coworker showed me photos of her anal fissures. I'm not a doctor. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I witnessed my dad spreading his ass cheeks to show my mom the rashes his hemorrhoids are giving him. FML
Today, I went to the ER as I have an ulcer and I was exhibiting signs of a perforation. This is when the gorgeous doctor told me he had to stick his finger up my butt to check for rectal bleeding. FML
Today, at work, man who was buying medicine for his son came up to me for help. He didn't know how to explain it to me, so instead he showed me a picture of a rash on his kid's butthole. FML
Today, my girlfriend was rushed to the hospital with anal tearing. We've never tried anal before, but it turns out she and my "best friend" sure have. FML
Today, my mom came home from surgery. Upon arriving home, she flashed a paper in my face and said, "Want to see pictures of my colon?" My eyes are still burning. FML
Today, I figured out why my doctor repeatedly warned me to keep regular bowel movements while I recover from childbirth. I now have an anal fissure. It's like giving birth all over again. FML
Today, I tore my ass crack. No, not my asshole, my ass crack. I don't know why, I don't know how, I just know it hurts. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's office. People kept staring at me and I couldn't figure out why. Later, I realized my sister's puppies had chewed a noticeable hole in my pants' crotch. FML
Today, on my break, I decided to be friendly and chat with a co-worker that everyone else always seems to avoid. He spent the next ten minutes telling me all about his abcessing sebaceous cysts. Apparently, "The scars look just like gunshot wounds." FML
Today, as a nurse, I had to tell a 15 year-old girl that her red, sore asscrack was caused by consistently not wiping her ass properly. Seriously, when I examined her there was still poop, even though she swore she wiped this morning. I had to teach her how to do it properly, at 15 years-old. FML
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Top comments
woainishamu 21
Your coworker sounds like an ass.
badassmf1234 22
How did that possibly seem like a good idea to someone?
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Comments (31)
woainishamu 21
Your coworker sounds like an ass.
HoboMeth 36
Anal Retentive
Poundit 17
Maybe you meant this ass the psychology term, but it still doesn't make sense in this context lol
Shade0000 9
#15 either meant "as" or it was the worst pun I've ever heard
Poundit 17
I tried and you guys put me down for it... that's not nice :(
laden_swallow09 35
We don't have to be nice to give you what downvotes you deserve.
Poundit 17
You don't have to be an asshole. ****, this whole community is just a bunch of assholes
badassmf1234 22
How did that possibly seem like a good idea to someone?
gabimk23 13
how cl(ass)y of her
shady914 14
Some people have no sense of boundaries..Fyl OP
trucker2 33
Ask for another picture- then post it on the help wanted board... Bare ass the next question to someone else...
SecundusSecunda 27
I'm not sure why you would suggest that How would that help the OP, at all?
trucker2 33
Help wanted... It's not op job
captainsmegma 12
And your diagnoses is
iiTzNeeNerz 26
That's a not-so-subtle way to call someone an asshole... Not saying you are, OP. Just putting it out there.
CarleeLynneXO 5
what an ass!
BananEnigma 24
Are you sure it was HER ASS and not some random ass from the Internet to troll you? :D