Today, I went to the ER as I have an ulcer and I was exhibiting signs of a perforation. This is when the gorgeous doctor told me he had to stick his finger up my butt to check for rectal bleeding. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I felt a very sharp pain, like my appendix was going to burst. After going to the doctor, I was rushed to the hospital to get tests done. The doctors later told me there's nothing wrong, I was just constipated. I went to the hospital for them to basically tell me I'm full of shit. FML
Today, I visited the doctor. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML
Today, I had horrible pains in my stomach area so I went to the doctors. They couldn't find anything wrong and sent me to the Emergency Room for X-rays. After spending the entire day in the hospital, they tell me I'm slightly constipated. I had to pay $400 to find out I had to take a shit. FML
Today, I went to the doctor's. I had food poisoning last week, which led to diarrhea. The diarrhea was so bad it caused a hemorrhoid. The hemorrhoid somehow became infected. One bad sandwich, and now I have an infected asshole. FML
Today, at the age of 25, for the first time in my life, I was lying mostly naked in front of a man while he was inserting something in my body. Too bad that man was a doctor and that thing was a colonoscopy. FML
Today, I had my anus probed twice by two different doctors. I was diagnosed with hemorrhoids. I'm a 22 year old guy and have to schedule a colonoscopy for next week. I guess there's a first time for everything. FML
Today, I got diagnosed with stomach ulcers. They are very painful, and I have been throwing up blood. On my latest trip to the toilet, I was heaving and the pain was making me beat the floor with my fist, the toilet lid decided to come crashing down on my head, giving me a minor concussion. FML
Today, just like every day for the past two months, I have bled quite a lot into the toilet. The emergency room said it was a GI bleed, but that it would take a while to get it checked. Six weeks is not what I expected. FML
Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML
Today, what started with me forcing a shit a little too hard ended up with me being rushed to the hospital with appendicitis. FML
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Top comments
BurnInDemonFire 39
This is not an FML. This is a standard medical procedure. Though I guess it depends where your ulcer is.
Davros 12
Mom, how did you and dad meet?
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Comments (22)
BurnInDemonFire 39
This is not an FML. This is a standard medical procedure. Though I guess it depends where your ulcer is.
Emma Marshall 19
Yeah no shit. The hot doctor was still sticking their finger up their bum!
free_parking 3
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
the plot twist is that this woman 400lbs and not attractive to any sane man alive
real life problems 26
The cows are mooing together and pressing thumbs down faster than they wolf down a big mac.
julfunky 29
How is that a plot twist?
bluhbluhbluh 14
this is an FML not a porno...
Zekfen 17
He must have heard that you give out anal before the first date.
Glowworm56 27
This is only an FML if this was the closest to being sexually touched in months.
RichardPencil 32
He doesn’t need to do that. He just wants to just for fun ;)
boredgirl_02 14
When I was a kid I had to have an enema by a cute nurse.... mortifying. I feel your pain
Davros 12
Mom, how did you and dad meet?
oldtimer 3
Sounds like sexual assault. A finger in the anus is to check on size of prostate of a male. Checking for bleeding needs to be seen by endoscopy, colonoscopy, or sigmoidoscopy depending on where the ulcer is.
mikbrooke 25
finger in the anus is to check for any signs of rectal bleeding, compaction of stool, haemorrhoids, prostate, multiple things. scopes are to check where the source of the bleed is coming from. it is most definitely not sexual assault.
mikbrooke 25
finger in the anus is to check for any signs of rectal bleeding, compaction of stool, haemorrhoids, prostate, multiple things. scopes are to check where the source of the bleed is coming from. it is most definitely not sexual assault.
fabs1171 23
Sorry, standard practice and not just to check the prostate
BiGTiMeNeRD 29
Let me guess, you're not really a doctor but you play one on FML?
wanted_2_want 40
Not even a first date and he already got to 5th base!!
Charlie Given 28
Did ya say sure sexy of it's the LONG finger 😉