Today, I babysat a 9-year-old kid for the first time. The moment his parents left the house, the little shit looked me dead in the eyes and let me know that if I didn't let him do whatever he wanted, he'd tell his parents that I touched him in his "no-no place". Suddenly I hate kids. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I babysat a 6-year-old boy for the first time. When I said it was his bedtime, he just screamed "Eat a dick!" at me. I was so shocked, all I could do was leave him be. When his parents returned, I had to make up an excuse for why he was still awake and watching TV, to save my pride. FML
Today, I babysat an 11 year old kid while his parents ate out. As soon as they left, the kid asked me if I wanted to be on the sex offender's list. Before I could even process that, he told me to stay out of his way and he wouldn't accuse me of anything. FML
Today, I was babysitting a little boy for the first time. He kept using all sorts of profanity toward me the whole evening, so I told his mom when she picked him up. She just grunted and muttered, "Fucking cunt-ass snitch." FML
Today, I babysat a 10-year-old and we played Pokémon. It was my first time playing, so he showed me. I ended up winning and the kid started crying and told his parents he hated me. They decided not to pay me for the night, and now I'm out of a job. FML
Today, I babysat the brattiest and most foul-mouthed 8-year-old I've ever met. After I survived three hours of it, his parents finally came home. He claimed I'd invited a boy over and that we did "stuff" on the couch all evening. They believed him. I didn't get paid, to say the least. FML
Today, I babysat a 10 year old from hell. She kept insulting me, saying I have tiny boobs, that boys must hate me, and that I'm ugly. I eventually got fed up and put her to bed. When her parents came back, she ran out of her room in tears and told them I'd beaten her. They believed it. FML
Today, I babysat a kid who was such a bratty little prick that I actually considered walking out on the job. After his mom finally got home 4 hours later, he called her a slut. When he got in trouble for it, he claimed that I taught him the word. Needless to say, I didn't get paid. FML
Today, I was babysitting a boy who was 11 years old. He told me that he loved me and wanted to be my boyfriend. I told him that I think he is a really great kid but I'm 17 so it would never work out. He said okay. When his parents came home he told them that I hit him and started crying. FML
Today, I was babysitting a four year-old. He was mad and began hitting me. I told him to use his words not his fists when he's mad. He then began telling me how much he hated me, and that I should go die and never come back. FML
Today, I was babysitting a 4-year-old, and we decided to play a game of hide and seek. Before he started to count, he looked me in the eyes and said that if I hid in his spot, he'd murder me with a knife when he grows up. I have to babysit this kid for the rest of the summer. FML
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Top comments
Since1998 20
I would tell him to say it again, but record it. Then show that to his parents. Similar situation happened to me and that worked out. Just don't openly show the phone is out, pretend you're texting.
Crenny 16
What a brat.
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Comments (152)
Faeryl_fml 6
You should have immediately called his parents, told them what he said and that they need to cancel their plans and come home because you're leaving. What a little shit :/
Amazeman 5
If your in America ask for more money :P and threaten to sue
jkmartinjk 16
Nope.
buckdharma 38
That's when you tell him about all the children you've skinned alive without touching their no-no.
leeloo900 9
Well, don't screw it up OP. Let the kid do what he wants as long as it's not illegal (I doubt he'd do anything illegal; he's a kid) It's that easy.
TheLadyOpal 30
Yes, let's teach the little shit stain that blackmailing people will get him whatever he wants.
leeloo900 9
It's not blackmail. That's how you get what you want. I do it all the time and it works =)
slyde32 12
you just described blackmail, the kid was black mailing op, or extorting if you want a different word, I would not watch any kid that threatened me like that. I've had people accuse me of rape before, pissed off exes and such, it's horrible, and resulted in a lot of people wanting to kill me, luckily the police were never informed
leeloo900 9
I guess it was a bad time to use sarcasm.
Blaphlafagus 19
You suck at sarcasm then
loathingloser 14
"Little shit" ahah What my sister and grandma call me
thatguynamedsky 32
you should have called the parents right then and told them, and told them you no longer want to babysit their child ever again
katina1236 20
Been there done that, little boy was mad at me for not letting him watch an X rated movie before bed, claiming his mom let him watch it, he was 6 at the time. I told him it wasn't happening and put him in time out and to bed early.
Sakuraashita 15
Tell the parents and see if they'll play along with it. Try and set up a whole fake arrest to freak the kid out and teach him a lesson. Have somebody tell him he has to go into witness protection or something. It would be upsetting once, but he'd never do anything like that again.
laden_swallow09 35
Taking the context of the FML, the kid really doesn't care about anyone save for himself, and would smile a fiendish smile when OP is shoved into the squad car.
PhoenixMartinez 30
Yeah, but if he thought he had to be in witness protection, he would be upset, he would have to move and leave all his friends.
soragirlfriend 8
You think this kid has friends?
ShortyJorty 9
This kids good... I'm wondering what happened to his former babysitters.
tehdarkness 21
I would have called the parents immediately and told them I quit. What a little shit.