Today, during swimming in PE, I kept noticing a stinging feeling on my scrotum. Every time I jumped into the water I would feel a sharp stab. After the full hour of hell, I went to the bathroom and looked in my new trunks. The designer had left a sewing needle in the crotch netting. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I went swimming. While I was walking along side of the pool, everyone was staring at me. I began to think that my diet was really working. It was only an hour later, in the changing rooms, that I noticed the string from my Tampax that was sticking out of my swimming costume. FML
Today, I went swimming at a public pool. When I dove in, my speedos decided they’d had enough of me and slipped right off. I spent a minute underwater debating my life choices before realizing they’d floated to the shallow end, right next to a group of giggling kids. FML
Today, I was riding my bike without the seat cover on. I hit a curb wrong and the two metal rods from the skeleton of the seat went through my jeans. I went to the med clinic to then find out that I had to get stitches in my scrotum. There were no male doctors. FML
Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML
Today, I rubbed my heel raw with a new shoe, so I put a bandaid on and went to the pool. A few minutes later, I noticed the bandaid floating close to me. I'm not an ass so I quickly fished it out and put in the pocket of my swimming trunks. Later, I went to shower and noticed that my bandaid was still on my heel. FML
Today, I was lifting weights at the gym and felt proud of myself for pushing through a tough set. Then, I looked down and noticed my shorts had ripped right along the seam. Based on their disgusted faces, everyone behind me got an unwelcome show. FML
Today, at the pool, I tried to impress the hot lifeguard by doing the perfect dive. Afterward, I realized my shorts were floating through the water. FML
Today, I was swimming my routine laps at the gym's pool and a man came in and swam in the adjacent lane. While swimming freestyle, I smelled a really nasty fart. Not a minute later, he hurriedly left. I didn't realize what he had done until I saw "floating particles" in the water. FML
Today, I was in a rush to get to the toilet, I went in and sat on the seat. Then I felt a stinging pain on my left bum cheek. I jumped up quickly to see a wasp splashing around in the bowl. It stung me, and now have a bum cheek twice its normal size, and pee all over my pants. FML
Today, I got a lovely little surprise after I got out of the shower. That lovely little surprise? I got stung in the scrotum by a hornet that had decided to nestle itself inside the towel I was drying off with. FML
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Top comments
camer0n15 8
Sue them
DocBastard 40
It took you an entire hour to check out why your balls were getting stabbed? Sorry, but if I ever feel like I'm getting a scrotum piercing, I'm going to immediately find out why. I'm not sure who is more stupid - you or the person who left the needle there.
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Comments (163)
GoW_Chick 15
Why didn't you check when you first felt it, you know when you feel pain it's your body telling you something is wrong. I bet you were distracted trying to show off your amazing cannon ball to the ladies. ;)
aFreedom127 9
Someone needs a band aid and a kiss to make it feel better.
SlipStream93 2
Ahaaaa! Someones gonna be making money in court!
Shadow_Phantom 26
o_o Probably not the same, but I can imagine a needle down there. Ow, owwww.
wriptidez 0
what 7 said
dirtroadmopar 0
that waters so cold it feels like needles on my dick
marisadc79 0
Major lawsuit waiting to happen but honestly you should have checked before class let out
fcukU30to1 2
YDI for not checking the first time
Amy78_fml 11
Something similar happened to me. I put a brand new outfit on my son who was 18 months old at the time. He whined off in on, but he was a cry baby and I didn't think much of it. While undressing him for his bath, something poked my finger. There was a broken sewing needle in the seem. You could tell where they started a new thread and just sewed over the broken pieces. He only got scratched a little by it, but it could have been worse. I sent an e-mail to the manufacture and to Goody's, the store that I had purchased the outfit from. I was contacted the same day by Goody's and the vice president of customer relations sent him five new outfits and a hand written apology. I didn't ask them for anything either. My main complaint to them was that it was a quality control issue with the manufacturer.
SwaggerMelon 6
Cool story bro.
redhedsaysrawr 18
do what #73 did- email the store AND designer... free stuff!